Category: the best thing ever blog game

In the comments here.

Basically, it’s the adorably aggressive sarahk — as every character in her selection, The Princess Bride — against, well, all the rest of you players.

Han Solo has weighed in with some nice smack. Good job, Han Solo!

But all the rest of you better start bringing your A game or sarahk will eat you alive. She’s cute and all, blah blah, but she’s a little tasmanian devil. BE. WARE.

Oh, and even if you’re not a player in this year’s tournament, you may still smack.

I declare it legal.

All right.

Time to enter for The Best Thing Ever: America.

The theme is Best American Movies.

If you’re new to the game, here’s an explanation.

Also, IF your entry is a first-time comment, it WILL go into moderation. But, I will honor the time stamp on your comment. It’s first come, first served with the entries. So if your comment does end up in moderation, it doesn’t necessarily mean you won’t get a slot.

The Best Thing Ever starts with the quarterfinals of The US Open, so it’s eight entries total.

You are playing for a lovely and incredibly desirable prize that I’m not mentioning yet. Hahaha.

Enter now, pippa!

Correction: Pacific Daylight Time. Sorry. Pacific Daylight Time. Pacific Daylight Time.

I will be accepting entries for The Best Thing Ever: England in a post at 12 Noon PDT on Monday, June 29th.

12 Noon PDT Monday, June 29th.

First come, first served. First eight entries. Unless your entry is waaaaaay off base from the theme of British Movies. I mean, come on, no ET.

The game starts when the quarterfinals of Wimbledon start.

Keyboards ready with those entries, peaches.

Weeeeee!!

Okay. Wimbledon started TODAY at The All-England Tennis Club, pippa. So that means that The Best Thing Ever: England will be under way within mere days. For anyone new to the blog and therefore new to the game, there’s a dizzy — and ditzy — explanation of the game here.

So. To give you some time to think of what your entry will be, I’m giving you this year’s theme now.

Ready?

This year’s theme:

The Best Thing Ever England: British Movies.

Meaning: Movies made in Britain or about British people or both. Basically, I’m not going to be too particular here, but if the movie is dripping with British accents, then, BINGO! It qualifies, okay?

So start thinking now. I’m not taking entries now, just giving you a heads up. Also, please remember: The Boo-Bye Speech. I’m very big on the Boo-Bye Speeches. If your player/best thing is ousted from the tournament, please post a Sad Boo-Bye speech in the comments. Be as bitter and snarky and petulant as you need to be. Quote lines from your movie. Whatever. We’ve had some awesome, hilarious speeches in the two years I’ve done this. It’s one of my favorite parts of the game. Giving everyone free rein to be horrible bad sports. I love it. If you don’t feel you can do this, then you don’t have to place an entry. It’s a little more interactive than just sitting back and watching the fortunes of your player/best thing.

Also: Talking smack is not only encouraged, it’s basically required. Beware Sarahk. She is adorable and precious but she is also the devil incarnate and she skeers me.

I will take EIGHT entries — first-come, first-served, as usual. I’ve done 16 in the past and it was too hard to stay on top of it. (Haven’t decided if I’m doing the men’s or ladies’ draw yet. Rafael Nadal isn’t playing, so no hope of a Nadal/Federer match-up. Ladies may be more interesting this year — both Williams sisters and Maria Sharapova. I’ll decide on that shortly.)

And, yes, I have a prize. A completely ridiculous prize to be revealed later. It’s glorious in its stupidity!

So, again, don’t post entries YET.

This is just a chance for you to think about what your entry might be.

Get ready!!

Wimbledon starts in less than a month.

That means The Best Thing Ever — England is coming up, too.

And over the weekend, in the midst of my meditative trance brought on by the Eagles and Timothy B. Schmit’s dead sexy fingers, I hit on the perfect insane prize for the winner.

I’m quite excited about it all.

Be prepared.

“Hey, what happened to The Best Thing Ever, US edition?”

Well, pippa. Just too much stress-eroo going on behind the scenes here to do that this time around. But thank you for asking and even noticing that, uhm, it’s not happening.

There’s always The Best Thing Ever, England, next June/July!

We’ll just have to muddle through until then.

Again, though, thank you for your query!!

In the Championship Match today ……

Faramir

eschewing the sword and, uh, killing, bonked unconscious with a quarterstaff …..

Jane Eyre

In a vicious, VICIOUS match between sisters, Faramir, who looked unsteady in the early stages, ultimately stood victorious next to his pouting and — I’m sorry — blatantly bitchy sister, Jane Eyre. The entire match was an unrelenting full frontal assault by both sisters prompting one spectator to cry out in a sublime moment of enthusiastic neutrality, “COME ON, WILLIAMS!!” (That’s the girls’ surname, of course: Faramir and Jane Eyre Williams; um, didn’t you know?) With such palpable intensity to the play, this lazy newsgirl couldn’t help but wonder what deep-seated issues they were trying to blast through out on that court. Kinda scary, really. At one pivotal point, younger sister Jane threw her racket to the ground in a tantrum of self-disgust. She is no bird, you know, but a free human being with an independent will. Yes, clearly, Jane Eyre; we are all very impressed. Thank God Mr. Rochester is blind. I’m just saying, is all. From there she seemed to spiral down and Faramir, sensing weakness, took advantage and turned the tide of the match, later delivering a record 129-mph serve. Pretty amazing with a quarterstaff, no?

After the match, a sulking Jane Eyre — clearly possessed by the devil, so different was her personality — glowered and snarked, when a reporter commented she didn’t seem pleased or she seemed upset (honestly, this reporter couldn’t hear the question exactly), “Oh, I wonder WHY.”

Uhm, okay. Please lighten up, Jane Eyre. Good Lord.

But ….. CONGRATULATIONS, FARAMIR, Champion of The 2008 Best Thing Ever England!

You win The Cup (and various sundries)!

Contact the game mistress with your information.

And a huge THANK YOU to all tournament players for all the merciless smack and sore losing and enthusiastic death threats, etc.! You definitely made it a Best Thing Ever to remember!

WELL PLAYED, ALL!!

ME: (shoving the box under his nose) Taste these right NOW!
HE: (tasting) Uh-oh.

White Cheddar Cheez-Its.

Meet your life’s true purpose.

So The Bronte Blog linked to our recent little convo between Jane and Faramir.

That’s so nice, but, I gotta be honest and say that what’s going on ’round here til Saturday morning will make no sense — zero — to anyone clicking over.

I mean, it barely makes sense to me.

I should get drunk and it will all become clear.

It’s set: Saturday morning, Breakfast at Wimbledon:

Jane Eyre

VS HER SISTER, HER ENEMY, HER FELLOW INSUFFERABLE DIVA …..

Faramir

Smack away, ladies!

(Where IS Jane?? Someone smack for her, if nothing else, ‘kay?)

Good luck and good matches, brats.