and
Um, look. Readers Who Either Go To My Church or Used to Go But Are Now Unable to Go Because You Moved — maybe verrry far — Away, you’re still out there.
How do I know?
I now have this little thingy called Site Meter. It tracks pretty much every aspect of a reader’s visit: the date, the time, how long the visit was, what you read, where you live. Just my little way of knowing a little sumpin’-sumpin’ about you. With some of you I’ve simply deduced who you are through the Site Meter. Some of you I know exactly which stat you are. It’s obvious. And all of you share one thing in common — you keep going back and back and back to that post.
(Again, I’m referring to Church Readers in that paragraph.)
Because I’ve never shared this blog with friends and family, I don’t really have too many readers from MyTown, USA. Though I did have a few sweet readers from MyTown, USA — to whom the post did not even apply — who had needless pangs of conscience and emailed me, explaining where they live, that they don’t know me, wondering if they could still read or not. They were very sweet and very upfront, and of course, they can still read if they’d like. No problem.
A few other readers from MyTown, USA, again, keep going back to that post. Hm. I wonder …..
Remember, anyone who’s reading this: This applies to a very specific group of about 5 to 6 people from my church. If you’re not in that group, this doesn’t apply to you in any way.
I can’t keep saying I’m sorry to you, Church Readers. I can’t quite figure it out, but somehow it seems that I’m the one who feels horrible that I’m asking you to stop. It doesn’t seem you feel anything at all similar about your readership — no bad or sorry or horrible feelings, no pangs of conscience because ….. you’re still there.
Do you want me to start calling you out by name on the blog?
Do I post a picture or something?
Please. I graduated from junior high lonnnng ago.
But so did you.
What I’m wanting and needing and pleading for is an across-the-board withdrawal of any church people as readers. Maybe you think: Well, my situation is different. I can still read because ….
I’m sorry. It’s not. You can’t.
(Well, obviously, you can. That’s the problem. And we’ve covered this already.)
I’m hoping, naively, I guess — as was suggested on that post, I guess it’s true — that people, Christian people, just might honor a request like mine. Again, in real life, if you were at a party in someone’s home and the host asked you to leave for whatever reason, would you just continue to party on with impunity? In real life, if someone had broken up with you because she simply needs a different situation in her life and had basically given you the “it’s not you, it’s me” speech, would you then just start to park your car outside her house, sit there, and watch?
This really is NOT personal, although I imagine most of you will take it that way. Maybe you’ll decide I’m a bitch. Okay, fine.
But this bitch has gotta try to set some boundaries.
I don’t hate you or dislike you or anything, but I am deeply disappointed by your seeming unwillingness to acquiesce and, um, more than a little disturbed as to why you won’t let go.
Plus, kinda pissed off at this point.
You know, I simply and deeply desire to get back to the type of more anonymous and free blog I had when I first started, before the happenstance occurred that lead church readers to this blog. If I’m unable to get there because this particular group won’t honor my request, I will be forced to take my management of this blog in a direction I don’t want to and shouldn’t have to.
How about this? Why don’t you pray about whether to stop reading my blog?
I’m serious. You know, “WWJD?” and stuff. I know that I don’t rule your conscience; the Holy Spirit does.
(And that’s what’s so vexing ….)
Look, I have not shared everything there is to share about this situation and I won’t, not here, but there are good reasons why I MUST ask this of you.
I don’t want to have to move … again. I saved up money for months to pay for this new blog and worked hard to have the blog I really want to have. Are you going to make me abandon my new cyber home? Are you claiming squatter’s rights here? I own, but you occupy? Are you really not going to be the people I’d hoped you’d be?
Please. Please.
Ugh! i hear you. My own family doesn’t know that i have a blog either. Good luck!
As your sitemeter will tell you, I found you via RTG!
Mmmmm..know that feeling really well.
/please stay on subject of thread…
If all else fails, block those particular people from viewing your blog.
It sucks. It completely sucks.
I feel ya, dog. I really do. I’m pissed too.
My blogger friend Angi password protects occasional posts, and her friend Jeanette
has a password to access her whole blog. If these “Christians” don’t cease and desist, you could resort to that.
wow…yeah, this is unpleasant.
sarah’s suggestion would work. Another road would be to go password-protected, although that would be a major effort for you; you’d have to ask people who read to e-mail you (or you’d have to e-mail your “invisible internet friends” that you know read the blog a lot) and you’d have to send them the password.
if any of the people you’re asking to leave you be emailed you, you could give them a misspelled password or something. Or just flat out refuse.
I don’t know. People are ornery. That’s one fact of life I’ve recently learned. They generally do what they want, even if their conscience (or other people) are asking them to do otherwise.
Attention Voyeurs! You are not anonymous! And soon we will know what you wore to church on Sunday. And whether or not you said, “Hello, love the blog,” or just looked down and away when you felt Tracey looking at you with both eyes. If you know what I mean.
I feel for you Tracey. I certainly hope you folks please respect her wishes.
Hello Tracey, me here, remember me, with the unusual first name? I completely understand your desire to remain anonymous on the web. Having just started the process of starting a blog, this thread is giving me second thoughts. Like you, I’ve thought a blog would give me the outlet to write, and spout off about things. I would tell a few friends and MAYBE some family. The thought that someone would use my real name scares me. But the thing is………it is the World Wide Web. When it’s out there, it’s out there. If you don’t want it “out there” maybe it’s the wrong medium for you. As for the church lady lurkers……..let em lurk! If one of them wants to make trouble because you use the “B” word. Let em!!! I had to give up long ago (forcebly) what church people think. Sorry so long.
I do have to agree with Chick Voice in that on the web “when it’s out there it’s out there”. I think the web is less like one’s own home and more like….say, a book store, or coffee shop – someplace that the public does not have to be invited into, but can just wander in at their leisure. Unless the person actually causes trouble, there is nothing you can do to prevent them from coming in – they are within their right to do so, even if you don’t like them there. On the other hand,
“Hey, Church people, what is it that you find so interesting about this blog that you continue to obsess over it, even knowing you are not wanted here?”
Maybe they want to be more like you, Tracey. Maybe reading your blog is like an upper class Victorian woman from back in the day, sneaking in some illicit reading, living vicariously through the characters of the novel…..Ok, I’m just saying….
Well, CV, I’m not going to let their presence make me quit blogging. And yes, it’s the World Wide Web, but again, the odds of what happened to me actually happening to me were incredibly small. Don’t let that scare you off. And if you feel friends and family are “safe” to blog in front of, then by all means, invite them. I didn’t feel that way, mostly with family.
And yeah, they’ll probably still lurk — the church people — but to my way of thinking, they’ve forfeited any right to ever express offense about anything I might write.
I just thought I’d ask, you know?
And Lori, yes, you hit it, that’s the question:
/Hey, Church people, what is it that you find so interesting about this blog that you continue to obsess over it, even knowing you are not wanted here?/
Exactly.
I can totally sympathize. My dh is a pastor, and I would completely freak if any of our CM’s happened to my blog. Which is why I am anonymous, and password protect posts relating to my family or anything else I don’t want to come back to haunt me.
I check my site meter every couple of days, and block any IP’s that are in my area. kind of paranoid, but I really don’t want to have to censor myself, after all, it is MY blog! lol.