Snippets from my afternoon with The Banshee. I’d spent my entire morning at The Beanhouse right before this. Let’s just say I was a little frazzled already.
I walked into my brother’s house and Banshee’s Uncle Chad was there. (My sister-in-law’s brother.) He was there to cover until I could actually get there. Uncle Chad is a newly minted lawyer in his mid-ish 20’s. He looks 15, like a precious little boy. He welcomed me with these huge eyes and pale face and began moving for the front door the minute I walked in. Banshee was eating her lunch. And before poor Uncle Chad could make it to the front door, she blurted:
“Chad on’y played with me for two minutes!”
Chad had already disappeared around the corner in his attempt to escape. But there was a pause and then, “Now, wait a minute, Banshee.”
Haha. The lawyer had kicked in. He came back around the corner. I just stood and watched and ate a banana. Not my problem.
He kept going.
“How many books did I read you?”
He was actually arguing his case with a 2-year-old. I kinda loved him right then.
“Uhh ….. four,” Banshee said to her plate.
“Right.”
And he kept GOING! “And how many stories were there altogether?”
“Uhhh ….. I finnnk …. six.”
“That’s right. So don’t be saying I didn’t play with you.”
Banshee’s head slumped towards the table. Chad had cross-examined her into submission and near-unconsciousness. God help me — it was a thoroughly satisfying moment.
He looked at me, utterly spent. “I gotta go.”
“Of course. I understand.”
He walked out the door, closing it a little harder than necessary, but I understood. I really did. I folded my banana peel — I always fold my banana peels — and tossed it in the trash while The Banshee began babbling about Halloween. I plopped in the chair next to her, pretended to be listening while muttering about the lack of coffee in the house. Then she chirped:
“Next is Fanksgiving!!”
“Yeah. That’s right.”
Her face fell, all the sorrow a 2-year-old could muster.
“But …. we doan have any food.”
They have plenty of food.
Split seconds later, brightness again.
“Fanksgiving means we get to watch football and take naps!!!!”
I exploded into laughter. My stomach hurt. Her little face. Those big blue eyes. She was SO EXCITED about the killer combo of football and naps. My brother’s prints were all over this one, I knew that. But I could not stop laughing, barely choked out my words:
“Banshee, do you like football?”
“YEAH!”
“Do you like naps??”
“YEAH!!”
(Are you in a cult? Have you been brainwashed? Are you now an Operating Thetan? WHERE is The Banshee???)
“Wow. Then that’s gonna be a GREAT day for you.”
“Uh-huh,” she agreed, munching on her peanut butter burrito.
“Tee Tee?”
“Yes, Banshee?”
“Mommy and daddy always tell me to smile. But you doan tell me to smile.”
“Do you WANT me to tell you to smile?”
“Noo.”
“All right.”
“Tee Tee, how come you doan tell me to smile?”
“Because I think a person should smile when they WANT to smile. Do they tell you to smile because they’re taking your picture, maybe?”
“Yeaah.”
“Okay. Well, you do have a pretty smile, Banshee.”
“Yeaah.”
Bite of burrito.
“Tee Tee, why are you wearing your hair in a tail?”
“Oh, just to keep it out of my face.”
“You should wear it down.”
“I should, huh?”
“Yeah, you should wear it down for Unca B(eloved).”
Spoonful of applesauce.
“I ready for my nap now.”
“Okay. I’m ready for my nap, too.”
“Fanksgiving means we get to watch football and take naps!!!!†That kid is wise beyond her years. No wonder you love her so.
Chad cross-examined her! I can’t stop laughing.
so how did the nap go? does she truly love them?
and a two year old who knows that hair loose and down is WAY better than a ponytail for all the uncas out there? she IS wise!
Oddly enough, I am ready for a nap as well. That kid’s got some smarts.
“He was actually arguing his case with a 2-year-old” – HA!!! I know Solomon didn’t say anything in Proverbs about this, but he should of. He obviously doesn’t hang around 2-year-olds that often.
AS and Cullen — She ACTUALLY said that: “I ready for my nap now.”
Okaaay. It kinda freaked me out, knowing what I went through putting her to bed last time I babysat. She slept for over two hours. I, however, did not sleep at all because The Tattooed Tile Guy was redoing the shower in the bathroom 10 feet away from where I was sitting (but hoping to be sleeping) on the couch. Um, I didn’t know about The Tile Guy until I got there and I’m ALWAYS uncomfortable around plumbers and electricians and other workers who are strangers and males and in your house! I never know what to do around them. Stay nearby in case there’s a question? Make chitchat? Go to another part of the house? What if they steal something? What if they decide to attack me? Should I have 9-1 predialed on the phone?
Seriously, I have anxiety about this. NO WAY was I going to sleep while with A STRANGER IN THE HOUSE!! Not while Banshee was taking a nap!
So I sat there, clicking the channels on the TV, feeling he was judging my viewing choices.
But Banshee and I remain unkilled by The Tattooed Tile Guy.
She woke up from her nap and I listened through the door while she talked to herself about kangaroos.
Ahh, kangaroos. Those were the days.
I can’t get over the vocabulary on this kid.
haha!
Reminds me of Wordsworth’s “We Are Seven.”
Actually, all I can think of is Darby O’Gill and the Little People.
“It’s the banshee! Send it away!”
“But it’s not within my powers, man!”
Sorry…. I know how horrible that is (and she’s not even my niece), but I love that movie and, well… Once it sets out, it never returns empty handed!