I don’t even watch this show, this “America’s Got Talent.” But tonight, through the magic of ennui and exhaustion, with both of us simply unable — UNABLE, I tell you — to reach the remote, we were treated to a full 5 minutes, right at the very end of it. And that’s when we heard Piers (Simon Cowell) and Brandy (Sober Paula) challenge The Hoff (The Hoff) to sing LIVE on tomorrow night’s show!
PierSimon, with his tea-and-crumpet voice, said, “Why don’t you sing in front of your own countrymen and see what they really think about you?”
The Hoff tried to seem game, but his eyes had a strange glow, the glow of fear and suckiness.
“Ha ha,” coughed The Hoff.
“Well, will you do it?”
“Ha ha,” again. “Um, okay.”
“Really?”
“Well …. I’ll think about it.”
So while The Hoff was busy thinking about it, the producers were busy already airing the promo for tomorrow night’s show, featuring a clip of The Hoff, clutching a microphone, bearing down with great intensity. There was obvious furrowing of both brows.
Oh, The Hoff! How hard you do work for our amusement! How much we do appreciate you — for reasons you cannot possibly understand!
Stay Tuned, America. Tomorrow night, The Hoff will be workin’ it for you, thrusting his aging hips, risking compound fracture, fearlessly disproving the whole theory behind a show called “America’s Got Talent.”
Oh, come ON! Plop your butts down and pass me the popcorn!
I watch the show. And I watch mainly to see The Hoff’s reactions to the performances. Not his contrived little speeches afterwards, but his unguarded responses during. He’s just so awkward. It’s damn funny.
And he’s actually referred to himself as The Hoff on the show on more than one occasion.
Really? He refers to himself as The Hoff? I am just … speechless.
Yes. In fact, it’s kind of become a saying on the show: You don’t hassle The Hoff.
Just in case you miss The Hoff tonight you can check out his “Hooked on a Feeling” – which apparently was a big hit in Germany. Just plain funny in the U.S.!
http://www.youtube.com/watch.php?v=Gi2CfuqcUGE
But he says that — ABOUT HIMSELF??
Kathi — Yes, that video is so so disturbing.
What was wrong with the video? I was impressed. They must have spent tens of dollars on the visual effects… 😉