bookypants

Okay. Everyone is doing this meme. And I’d hate to be a joiner. But I’d hate to whine about being left behind, too. So I’ll just be a jhiner. A whoiner. And do the freakin’ meme already.

From Sheila.

What are you reading right now?

I’m reading Seven Gothic Tales by Isak Dinesen.

Do you have any idea what you’ll read when you’re done with that?

Well, there are Seven Tales, you see, and that’s quite a lot, so I’ll probably read something shorter.

What magazines do you have in your bathroom right now?

You mean, apart from the magazines for MB’s 9mm handgun that he chased me around the house with the other day?* Oh, well, let’s see, there’s that and oh, a mixed-media magazine. It is a pretty pretty pony and I love it.

* I am totally kidding. I chased him.

What’s the worst thing you were ever forced to read?

I remember hating Giants in the Earth, by Olefarrrken Hedda Gabler Rooodevarggge. I’m pretty sure that’s the dude’s name. But I don’t remember why I hated it so much. Also — that chapter on Commedia dell’Arte in my “History of Theatre” textbook scarred me forever. I hate you, Pantalone. Get away from me, you perv, with your giant crippling codpiece and your hooky penis mask. You sicken me.

What’s the one book you always recommend to just about everyone?

Oh, Giants in the Earth, for sure. I mean, I read it, so I want everyone else to read it and remind me why I hated it.

I also seem to recommend lots of Philip Yancey, my Disco-Stu Christian boyfriend.

Admit it, the librarians at your library know you on a first name basis, don’t they?

Well, one does, but I’m not going back til she leaves or dies because instead of greeting me with a cheery hello, she seems to like to scowl at me and bark, “Tracey, you need to pay up. You have $14 in late fees” and niggling stuff like that.

So I just started to feel unwelcome, you know?

And I mostly buy books now, because when you check out a book and love it and then have to give it back? Well, it’s like giving back a cute wiggly puppy, I say. Why do you think I owe Marion the Mean Librarian $14??

Is there a book you absolutely love, but for some reason, people never think it sounds interesting, or maybe they read it and don’t like it at all?

Well, I became very obsessed with Over the Edge of the World by Laurence Bergreen last year and I would go around saying, “Oh, you have just GOT to read this book about Magellan! I am telling you!” And people would either say, “Eh?” or “Who’s Magellan?” or “Lady, my dad will be here any minute to pick me up.” So, it didn’t seem to go over real well. Weirdos.

Do you read books while you eat? While you bathe? While you watch movies or TV? While you listen to music? While you’re on the computer? While you’re having sex? While you’re driving?

Suuure, all the time. Everywhere! And MB prefers that I read whilst having sex.

When you were little, did other children tease you about your reading habits?

No. I was teased more about my perpetually red burning face habit. And my dressing habits.

What’s the last thing you stayed up half the night reading because it was so good you couldn’t put it down?

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.