Sometime last night ….
ME: (speaking with mouth full) Do yuh wansum mangush slyshes?
What I really meant was:
Do yuh wansum mangush slyshes NOW? Becaush if you don’, there won’ be any leffor you tmorru.
HE: (speaking in a civilized way. Wiener.) No, thank you, not right now.
Guess he didn’t perceive the danger he was in. The imminent danger of not getting any mangoes. The danger of coming home to an empty bag with just a whiff of mangoes. They’ll be plenty of mangoes for me tomorrow when I want them, he blithely thought. Wiener.
Well, guess what? There ain’t. There ain’t ANY MORE MANGOES. I et the whole durned bag. I finished them just now and I expect to be overly-regular overly-soon.
But on the upside, I received 360% of my RDA of Vitamin A, all in only 540 calories and 126g of carbs.
Don’t you know, Wiener, that your job is to save me from myself??
Major applause for your math skillz. Not that I think you couldn’t do it–I’ve been encountering people who think 13.5 feet is 13 feet and 5 inches. You rock, and with all that Vitamin A your vision should be awesome. 🙂
“I can see for miiiiles and miiiiles and miiiiiles ……”
MB can get off the hook by blaming the 3.5 friends who didn’t show up to share the mangoes with you. Not his fault…
And there’s a good chance you’re gonna’ turn yellow! YAY!
Incidentally, just out of curiosity: Were you, perhaps, alone when the mango-eating started and then culminated in an empty bag? ‘Cause I can totally see you with a “guilty puppy” expression on your face, staring and chewing over the top of an empty Trader Joe’s bag. With something like, “What? They’re nutritious…” as the caption. 😉
I was alone, WG. It’s true. Also, I kept saying, “Well, it’s a really small bag.”
I KNEW IT! 🙂 LOL!
That sounds like an art film: “Alone with a Bag of Mango Slices.”