beanhouse lost and found

Found in a Ralphs grocery bag the other day out on the rainy patio:

Item 1.

Uhm …

Item 2.

Do they go together … er, something? Are they Christmas gifts for a friend? For grandpa? For little Stevie’s teacher? So far, no one has come forward to claim his creepy lost items, because let’s face it, what would he say?? WHAT??

And now, sometimes, one of my coworkers squeezes the bag under the counter to make Rummy talk and the whole thing is, uhm, truly disturbing. Tis the season to be jolly, dudes, not to imagine your private personal activities involving talking dolls of the executive branch.

I am ooged out.

11 Replies to “beanhouse lost and found”

  1. Ok, that was too disturbing for my waking up, little caffeinated brain to handle! A little warning next time, huh?! Ewwww. Someone needs to feel really confident about themselves to be purchasing something like that – having to give it to the cashier to ring up and imagine what they’re thinking. And I’m not talkin’ abut Rummy, you know.

  2. “What would he say?? WHAT??”

    Hahahaha! I would so love to hear that conversation.

    And I’m with Kathi. How do people make these purchases?

    Once, I went with a rather adventurous frined of mine to an adult bookstore, and I wondered how anyone actually made a purchase there. If I walked up to the counter with the “sleeve”, how would I not just die of embarassment on the spot?

    I know the clerk at an adult bookstore has likely seen everything, but still…

    Yikes!

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