AI … and stuff

“The American Songbook” American Idol.

I don’t really have a lot to say. I wasn’t holding out much hope tonight so I was doing dishes, actually, but I could still hear it. Let’s see. How’s this: Everyone was mostly good.

Except for …. KELLIE!

LORDDD!!! She’s so vapid, so empty. Can I just slap a blinking neon “VACANCY” sign on that bleach-blonde forehead?? Buh-BYE, Kellieeee! Enjoy your career a’pickin’ and a’grinnin’ at Dollywood.

Ace ….. um, that HAIR!! From the neck up, he looked like a member of the Ukrainian Women’s Gymastic Team. I mean, wha??? Gimme some balance beam, baby. NOW!!!

Katherine …. well, she FINALLY had her magic moment. She was a revelation.

And on an unrelated note: TomKat, your new baby girl is named Suri? Apparently, it means “princess” in Hebrew, chosen because … you’re both so Jewish?? And apparently, it means “red rose” in Persian, chosen because … you’re both so Iranian?? And how do you pronounce that, exactly? Is it “Sur-ee” as in “Surrey With the Fringe on Top”? Or is it “Sur-eye” as in “Sir, I need you to stop flashing your wee-wee at the kiddies”??

I mean, you REALLY named her Suri?!?

Xenu’s gonna be pissed, man.

6 Replies to “AI … and stuff”

  1. They’re not full-blooded Jews, they’re Jewish.

    Agree completely about idol. Everyone was good. The show was probably the best of the season.

    And Kellie was really bad.

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  3. LOL, Ukranian gymnast, no kidding.

    And when I heard they named her Suri, I truly thought, “I wonder if she has fringe on top.” That poor baby is gonna be so scarred. But I knew she didn’t have a chance when I heard that Tom had an adult pacifier standing by to make sure Katie had a silent birth.

  4. Sarah (NOT Suri) — WHA??? Are you kidding me about the pacifier thing? Because I’m very gullible about ANYTHING on the Tom Cruise front. He’s so insane, I’ll just believe it!!

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