a few local homeless people

~ The young dudes out by Target the other day with a sign that read Hobos Need Cheeseburgers.

You know, I appreciated the honesty. The truth in advertising here. They weren’t trying to pass themselves off as “Veterans” who “Need Help” or who “Will Work For Food.” No. No. They were what they were. Just a couple of grubby slackers who really wanted some cheeseburgers.

~ The man who stands on a particular busy corner every weekend with a sign reading Brunch Hungry.

This guy is a favorite of mine. The specificity of his need is both endearing and maddening to me. He is not hungry for breakfast or lunch or dinner. He does not want tapas or appetizers or hors d’oeuvres. He has no interest in a cuppa joe or high tea or cocktails.

No. He is Brunch Hungry, dammit.

Please deposit 24.95 in my can so that I may shuffle myself and my attendant muck off to the Hotel Del Coronado for champagne mimosas and flaky croissants and repeated trips to the omelette bar.

~ The man we saw many months ago who stood on a corner giddily waving a small sign in one hand, holding out his baseball cap in another. From a distance, we couldn’t see what the sign said, but whatever it was, the man was very happy about waving it. His face seemed like it could literally explode from the blazing joy that sign brought him. As we got closer, we saw it clearly.

The sign he waved with all his might was the front of a box of Kellogg’s Raisin Bran.

It seems that he urgently needed the whole world to know and share in his joy about the existence of Kellogg’s Raisin Bran! So we wondered: Was this an ad, like those dudes who twirl signs for condos that never sell? Did he want us to pour some Kellogg’s Raisin Bran into his outstretched cap? Was he some kind of Raisin Bran evangelist? Was he just high? What??

He waved at us, high on Raisin Bran, I guess, and we waved back. As we rounded the corner, I peeked over my shoulder at him one last time and saw the plain cardboard back of his sign:

“Will Work For Food!”

The sign was backwards and he was completely oblivious about it.

As I told MB what it said and we convulsed into laughter, I realized that I hoped he’d stay that way.

7 Replies to “a few local homeless people”

  1. I think Brunch Hungry opened for Hobos Need Cheeseburgers back in the mid-90’s at one of the Lolapalooza shows.

    When you’re hungry, you can grab a snack – but when you’re BRUNCH hungry, only one thing will do!

    I’m loving Raisin Bran Man.

  2. What are tapas? I hear and read about them all the time, but still don’t know what they are and why there are entire restaurants that only serve them.

    /we only have Chinese
    //and TexMex

  3. “Raisin Bran Man” is the best thing I have heard all week. (It’s been a crappy week). Thanks for making me smile, now I have the mental picture of him. Like my own personal “Failblog” page.

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