but my E*ypt Air post has ahold of me like some snarling pit bull and won’t let me go. It’s going to be very long and very personal and I’m not going to look very good in parts of it. I’m exorcising some demons with this one and, well, didn’t Joey say I needed deliverance?
But I’m almost afraid to post it when it’s finally done — mostly because people may read it and say “Is that all? Is that what she was freaking out about? THIS is exorcising demons? Wow.” My words for this post are so puny and my memories have been so carefully repressed and it’s just so damn frustrating.
But it won’t let me NOT write it. For WHATEVER it’s worth. I have no idea.
I’m sorry that I have nothing else right now — if anybody’s still there!
Take your time, hon! I am so sorry it’s this painful for you, I cannot even imagine.
Thank you, Lyn. It’s just …. really strange to articulate …. I’m finding things I didn’t know were even there …
The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say. ~Anaïs Nin
Writing, I think, is not apart from living. Writing is a kind of double living. The writer experiences everything twice. Once in reality and once in that mirror which waits always before or behind. ~Catherine Drinker Bowen, Atlantic, December 1957
I never know what I think about something until I read what I’ve written on it. – William Faulkner
You’re in good company 🙂
Tracy, may God be with you in dealing with this great loss in your life. These un-natural, yet seemingly normal for today, events of mayhem and disaster do have profound effects on us and how we live after them. I will pray for you as you sort out the writing of this post, may it be the vehicle God uses to help you begin to heal in mind and soul.
Tracey,
You can’t know how your work may be used to open the eyes and change the minds and hearts of others, even though it it is hard to put the painful into words.
We will be patiently waiting because we know from experience that it will be worth it.
Thanks, everyone. I can’t tell you how much I needed that encouragement. A true blessing!!