All right. In a moment of weakness, I tuned in to “The Apprentice: Martha Stewart” the other night. Seems she didn’t want to mimic The Donald’s catch-phrase of “You’re Fired!” because “they can’t be fired if I’ve never hired them,” breathed she.
Instead, she’s sniffing this gem at each week’s loser:
“I’m sorry. You just don’t fit in.”
Is this really the best the Queen of K-Mart could come up with? Or was it just something she kept hearing in the hoosgow? It’s seems quite snobby and country club, but very schoolyard and “neener-neener,” too.
I know she bakes. So how about, “Sorry, Slappy. But that’s the way the cookie crumbles.”
I know she cooks. So what about, “Look, Slappy. You can’t stand the heat; get out of my kitchen!”
I don’t know. At least Trump just fires ’em. They’re there and then they’re not. He doesn’t tell ’em they are “not a good thing.” (Wait. What about that one?!)
You must be able to think of one. C’mon. The Queen of Cell Block C needs your help.
Any other ideas?
No suggestions, but I did finally get the meme finished and posted!
It has revealed to me, that I am a total DWEEB!
Thanks, Tracey.
“Sorry, you’re just not Martha Stewart.”
‘CUZ NO ONE IS! Thank God. Yes, it does sound “quite snobby and country club, but very schoolyard and ‘neener-neener,’ too,” (which I *LOVE*, btw) but so does EVERYTHING THAT COMES OUT OF THIS WOMAN’S MOUTH! She is evil, and must be destroyed.
Props to her for going straight to jail without passing “GO!” and collecting $200. Props to her for rebuilding her crumbling empire. Props to her for the empire she built in the first place. BUT. I suspect anyone that fake and perfect *has* to be made of robot parts.
Give me Paula Deen any day. She licks the spoon, cracks jokes, and feeds the dogs on camera and — hold on to your doilies, girls — laughs. Genuinely *laughs*.
Martha Stewart is just so… sanitized… and… neat. There’s something robotically (or *gasp!* cyborg?!) creepy ’bout that.
Sorry if I’ve offended any Martha fans.
How about: “KNEEL BEFORE ZOD, SON OF JOR-EL!”
Nah. It’s been done.
-M@
I’m not even sure what that is, M@ — from Superman, I suspect? But it’s dem funny, DEM funny!! 😉
Yeah, it’s from Superman II. General Zod (one of the escapees from the Phantom Zone, who comes to earth and terrorizes it) says it to Supes. The thing I didn’t notice until I re-watched some Superman stuff a few years ago, was that Zod and his cohorts were imprisoned in Superman I, and then escaped in Superman II! It was one of the better bits of foreshadowing I’ve seen in comic-book movies, even better than the end of X-Men II.
-M
Hmm … M@, I’m all …. agape. 😉