So I dreamed last night that I was back in college. Some random college, not my college, because my college wouldn’t have done to me what this horrible dream college did to me last night.
You see, all the girls at this wretched dream college were forced to take a cheerleading class. It was required. Every girl. No guys. Just the girls.
In the dream, I was late to the first day of class. The room was packed. A perky female professor bounced around up front. I tried to slip into a seat in the back, when the perky professor called out, “L! A! T! E! Don’t you try to mess with me! You’re late! Very very late!” Every head in that room turned to stare at the impertinent girl who was oh so very L-A-T-E. I just slumped into the nearest seat and class resumed.
As it turned out, the class was some kind of weird cheerleading/history class amalgam. Near the end of the hour, the entire class was involved in an inspiring re-enactment of the Peloponnesian War. One large group of girls was Sparta. Another large group was Athens. Ten stragglers, including me, were divided by the perky professor into two groups of five.
We, of course, were the cheerleaders for the Peloponnesian War.
My group was the cheerleading squad from Athens.
(WOO-HOO! Go, Athens!!)
We sat cowering in the upper corner of the room while the war raged stupidly below us. The cheer squad for Sparta, on the other side of the room, also cowered. What did the perky professor expect from us?
A very large girl in my group looked at me and whispered frantically, “I think we’re supposed to do a cheer.”
“I don’t know any cheers.”
“You have blonde hair. You’re not a cheerleader?” (Hello, dream stereotype.)
“No!”
“Not even in high school?”
“Nope.”
“Well, we have to do something!”
From the front of the class, the perky professor sing-songed to us, “Gir-rrrrls!! Things are happening up here! Where are your cheers? Your soldiers need you!!”
And then ……. sad, but true …… I woke up! Right then! I don’t know what happened!
So, peeps, I leave it to you. Please tell me: What happened to dream Tracey and the cheer squads for the entire Peloponnesian War?
I’m sorry, but your grades came back. λ+ for the group, with one Δ for the girl who came up with Mother, Father, Girl and Boy! Stop your fighting, go sack Troy!
And the cheergirls from Sparta dined…. IN HELL!
Tracey, even your dreams are awesome. I wish I had dreams like that.
Oh, and:
“L! A! T! E! Don’t you try to mess with me! You’re late! Very very late!â€
I WISH I had the guts to do that (well, I would, except parts of me bounce more than I’d like them to when I jump up and down) when one of my “stragglers” comes in at 25 after the hour….
I still, all these years later, have the dream where it is final exam time, and I just remembered that I was registered for some strange class I know nothing about, like the a History of the Chemical Physics of Calculus, or some such thing. Anyway, it’s final exam time, and I haven’t attended a single lecture, or done a stitch of homework, so I must ace this exam to pass, and I can’t find the bloody classroom.
That is my recurring college nightmare. I have it at least a few times a year. Not nearly so entertaining as yours. There was no cheering, and no clever responses from Nightfly. Heck, there aren’t even any rhymes in my college nightmare. I need to have a stern talk with my subconscious.
NF — Hahahahahahaha! I’m dying! Plus, I’m always impressed with your mastery of symbols in the comments section here. HOW did you get Greek letters to show up?? The mind boggles.
ricki — I definitely think you need to work up a cheer. I’m laughing just thinking about you doing that.
MM — I know. I have the college dream a couple times a year, too. This was just a bizarre variation of the same theme.
Wow! And i thought my dreams were bizarre! I can’t even remember how the Pelopenesian (sp?) war ended so I can’t help you end your cheer…sorry! But I to still have the horrible college dream of having taken a class but never shown up for it b/c I’ve forgotten I’ve taken it. My other recurring dreamare is one where I’m wandering around w/o my shirt and undergarments in public and realize that I am but can’t seem to find any clothes to cover up with…I hate those dreams!!!
NightFly definitely wins this round of “Complete Tracey’s Dream”. I got nuthin’. At least nothing that witty and Greek.
Tracey – I’m impressed that you remember the details of the Pelopennesian War while asleep. The mind boggles. The Greek letters etc. are just a matter of having a reference printed out for such occasions. Lots of the basic stuff is ASCII codes (ALT key + a 3 or 4 digit code).
Strangly, though, lambda and delta were NOT in the basic ASCII chart like many of the other letters, so I had to cut and paste.
NF — Very impressive nonetheless!
LOL, tray! Hello, dream stereotype cracks me UP. And nightfly, you are too funny.