I can’t even explain this post …. I really cannot. Uhm, my finger hurts??
But in addition to the strain of my recent disfugurement and my looming head head, it seems that now, our massive espresso machine, known as the monster, has suddenly become sentient. And not like sentient wine cork sentient which would be truly horrifying, but sentient like that lovable HAL in 2001: A Space Odyssey sentient.
Witness this proof:
The monster has stolen my image, my essence, as you can see, trapping me inside, slicing off my body, and covering my mouth with a metal plate. Ah, our little monster. So huggably malevolent. So squeezably evil. Basically, he’s morphed me into a silent floating head, but I really seem okay with it. So much so that I’m clearly distracted by …. oh, probably something shiny. Or Talking Timmy just walked in. Eek! Can’t reach stopwatch!
More dehumanizing plates and letters and numbers. But I laugh at them. Laugh at them!!
“Hahahahahahaha!!”
MB’s essence also stolen. Or, really, mostly his hair and forehead and rolled-up eyeballs. God only knows what ungodly things the monster can do with those rolled-up eyeballs. He’s a scamp, he is!
See how the monster continues to take and take and take? Numbers and letters replace rolled-up eyeballs. Metal plate replaces neck. But — thank God! — I see the nose is still intact.
Thaaaat’s right, monster. You can have my candy corn finger, but step away from the nose.
