So Barbaro is dead. Okay. That’s sad. Whatever.
But I found myself howling with laughter last night when I heard a reporter on the news actually announce, in a reverent tone, “Barbaro had a last meal of grass.”
A last meal of grass? REALLY?? Who’da thunk it? A horse ate grass? No hamburgers for the condemned’s “last meal”? No blueberry pancakes? Grass? I am astonished! And did the condemned get to make a final statement before he bit the dust? Sheesh. Calm down, people. It’s a horse. Stop trying to make him human. Stop writing him love letters, like this:
“To my dearest Barbaro, rest in peace angel face. You are pain free now. You fought bravely. Now your spirit will run free. I will love you forever.”
I got that letter from this article.
Here’s another excerpt:
How many think Barbaro was heroic, or just doing what his human handlers wanted him to do? Or, had no choice what he was doing after being anesthetized? If we’re going to start looking upon horses as if they have human qualities, then shouldn’t we stop sticking a bit in their mouths, tying their tongues in place before races, gelding or loading them with steroids?
There is no question some people began to look upon this animal, though, as a creature with human qualities, but all indications are he went to his grave withholding comment about what he was trying to accomplish the last few months.
Hahaha. It’s a sad thing, yes, but keep it in perspective, people.
Yeah, I’m inclined to agree.
I’d add to the comment you blockquoted: and stop selectively breeding the things so that they’re inbred and PRONE to the types of problems that ultimately led to Barbaro’s being put down.
I mean, we can’t have it both ways. We can’t see horses as something just shy of human (or, perhaps, as some people see them, something BETTER than human but not quite, something just shy of the angels) AND also see them as a commodity to be exploited.
Where are the people talking about the “angel faces” who don’t quite make the big time? The ones who wind up being sent to the slaughterhouses or worked to death while training?
I’m not a big animal-rights type but I’m troubled by a lot of the things that happen in horse-racing in the name of entertainment and “business.”
Awww, why the long face?
(I couldn’t resist)
Tracey – hahahaha “a last meal of grass”
This reminds me a bit of that post you wrote about the pandas and people writing love letters to pandas. I was reading that post in public, I remember, and I had to stop because I was laughing out loud.
It was THE TOP NEWS STORY for over 24 hours here in Philly. I was half expecting some sort of live memorial service/burial coverage and an order to fly the flat a half mast. Finally the Eagles’ coach’s sons both got into accidents yesterday afternoon (not too far from where I live, too!) and now that’s all over the place.
Sounds like the love-letter-writers’ last meal also was grass. And Chee-tos.
ROTFL! I forgot the panda post! Can we get an encore?
Sheila — Yeah! I forgot to link to the panda post. I meant to, because it’s EXACTLY that. Where is that post about my insane panda rage? Hm.
Kate — HAHAHAHAHAHA!
/Finally the Eagles’ coach’s sons both got into accidents yesterday afternoon (not too far from where I live, too!) and now that’s all over the place./
It’s that word “finally” that’s killing me.
Brian — You must pen a love letter to Barbaro on this blog as your pun-ishment. 😉
Flag. I meant flag, not “flat.” Sorry, my blood sugar was low.
Yeah, Tracey, I think when I noticed the top story changed, a “Finally!” just unconsciously fell out of my mouth.
Ouch! A love letter pun-ishment!? Here goes.
Dear Barbaro,
I am so sorry we never got to know each other, I’m sure you were a nice horse.
I shall think fondly of you as my daughter and I make magazine picture collages with our new Elmer’s glue stick.
Much Love!
Your almost dear friend,
Brian
Brian — /Much love!/ Hahahahaha! I love the way you throw your daughter under the bus too.
You are evil. But you took your punishment like a man. 😉
Okay. I like this.
Anyone else care to write a love letter to Barbaro? LET’S HEAR IT!
I will copy them and send them to his empty stall.
It’s the least I could to thank you for the panda encore.
A horse is a horse
(of course, of course)
A horse is no angel face, of course
Unless of course
The name of the horse
Is the famous Barbaro!
We went to the source
And asked the horse
When he’d be back out on the course
He said, of course
Once his leg’s in force
He’ll be running to and fro!
“Maybe I’ll just go out to stud
Or frolic along and chew my cud
I’ll stamp and neigh
Make the kids say Hey!
It’s the famous Barbaro!”
But now that he’s gone
It’s sad of course
He really was kinda cool (for a horse)
But a horse he was
No more tears, because –
Barbaro wouldn’t want you to be so sad…
Dear Barbaro,
All of Philadelphia mourns your departure. How could we ever forget all the wonderful things you did, like when all those kids in comas at CHOP* awakened as the result of your triumphant win? Even Andy Reid’s sons couldn’t drive properly, what with all the tears in their eyes. Now that you’re gone, terrible, terrible, things are happening on our streets. We can only hope that all the studwork you did during your “recovery” will bring forth more magical horses like you to save our sorry, drug-laden, gun-violence ridden town.
Your hometown admirer,
Kate
*Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia for youse guys not from the area.
You guys are killing me.
Dear “Don,”
I was beginning to lose hope in your work, but now I can rest easy. No more mares rolling their eyes when I show up, no more gelding jokes or “second greatest horse in Philadelphia history,” no more whispers about being the Harding to Barbaro’s Kerrigan.
Payment is on its way, in the usual manner: third paddock from the door, under the feedbag. If the groomer’s there just tell him you’re looking for the john.
Sincerely,
Smarty Jones