oh, brother

Here’s a snippet from a 2005 blog post written by Baldy, big shiny “head” of the FOC. In part of it, he quotes from an article written by his buddy “Al” — Albert Mohler, president of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. The rest of it is ol’ Baldy himself.

This is the attitude in the FOC, pippa. A lot of insecure men posturing about how to be men. (Italics mine.)

And finally Al’s “President’s Journal” column titled “The Boy Problem, Then and Now” is an insightful summation of Terrence Moore’s essay, “Wimps and Barbarians: The Sons of Murphy Brown.” Here’s a great quote from Al’s column:

“Wimps, on the other hand, look to women for emotional support,

(This is wimpy? Isn’t this …… sorta normal?)

consider girlfriends to be conversational partners

(See the patriarchy rearing its ugly insecure head, pippa? You — the godly and non-wimpy man — cannot “partner” with a woman in conversation. She is subordinate to you in even basic conversation)

and look to women for pity.”

(I cannot think of any guy I’ve known — wimpy and non — who has ever looked to me for pity)

Don’t want to be one of those!

(God forbid! Buncha hellbound nancies!)

Somehow this reminded me of a rule I want us to adopt for our blog. No smiley faces allowed! (No way! That sucks! :-)) Real men do not use smiley faces on e-mails! (Oh, I agree! Emails are not the place for those! My real man only uses emoticons — and exclamation points — during sex! :-)) This is fine for the ladies, (with whom we will not partner in a conversational way! :-)) but not the men. Real men communicate humor 🙂 effectively without having to use a smiley 🙂 face and real men can discern the presence of genuine humor 🙂 without seeing a smiley 🙂 face. So let our blog be free from all wimp-like communication! ( 🙂 🙂 :-))

You know, Baldy, you seem overly concerned about appearing to be a wimp. Real men — and I’m not one, granted, so I can only base this on razor sharp perception 🙂 — don’t concern themselves with whether they’re a wimp. They’re too busy being men.

Just a short but piercing shriek of overcompensation here. Not to mention misogyny.

Ugh.

16 Replies to “oh, brother”

  1. sheila — And real men aren’t bores.

    But, yes, he just oozes nervousness and overcompensation. And the comments here about women are just so retarded, I can’t even deal with it.

    Brian — Hahahahahaha! Real men may freely use the emoticons on this blog because I don’t impose ridiculous rules on the real men who read my blog.

  2. I just woke up my semi-deaf old dog with a shriek of laughter upon reading this:

    “My real man only uses emoticons — and exclamation points — during sex! 🙂 ”

    Old Baldy and Al are quite the pair, and I suspect that between them they don’t even have a complete pair, given their patently obvious fear and loathing of women. Grind those heels down a bit harder, boys, you haven’t yet succeeded in crushing the spirit out of every female of the species.

  3. I’m sorry, did you say something? I hadn’t noticed, I was too busy drinking fire while Xtreme Killboarding.

    I’ll be around later to collect my pity and emotional support, kthx. 🙂

  4. I’m sorry, pippa. But if you have ever YouTubed this guy — Baldy — you’ll see an unattractive shiny-pated man with a strange staccato style of talking and a very obvious swishy vibe.

    Do a Google on “Don’t Waste Your Sports.” You can watch his ridiculous hour-long sermon ….. about, yes, sports.

    I’ve been so busy lately, I haven’t had time to write the post I’ve been meaning to write about that. It’s insane.

    INSANE, I TELL YOU!!! 😉 🙂 🙁

  5. Oh, NF — I do not believe you should be considering me a conversational partner. Since I am neither your wife nor your girlfriend, what level of conversational parity can I even hope to have with you or any of the other non-wimpy menfolk?

    (But still …. hahahahahaha.)

  6. I have to wonder: are things in his congregation going so swimmingly that he has time during the week to write this kind of meaningless claptrap?

  7. He is so full of himself. He does this one moment where he staggers a bit – as though he is just so awed and humbled by God – but it’s such a self-conscious PROUD moment that he seems truly maniacal.

    Also, just sayin’, he seems a bit gay to me. Not a surprise.

  8. sheila — Yup. Seems very gay to me. There’s some message either he or his wife gives where he/she talks about never refusing him sex. He gets it whenever he wants it. Allegedly. That’s the public face of Mr. Manly Man.

    Looking at him, I’m amazed ANYONE has ever said yes once. Okay. That’s mean. I just don’t happen to find him attractive at all.

    (One of his daughters looks just like him, poor girl. She has hair though.)

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