The pinkening of the NFL is making me sick.
Look, breast cancer is horrible. ALL cancer is horrible. It’s a plague. But is any adult alive actually unaware of breast cancer?
My BIL has oral cancer, a much more aggressive form of cancer — and it’s on the rise. It’s on the rise in the 20-50 age group mainly because of ….. sex.
So allow me to interrupt my post with an annoying and gratuitously gross PSA:
Approximately 30% of all oral cancers are caused by HPV-16, the strain of HPV that causes cervical cancers. Studies show that most adults who have more than one sexual partner in their lives WILL contract HPV — that’s how prevalent the virus itself is — but most cases will resolve on their own without the person even knowing they had it. Others will morph into oral cancer, which is generally caught at late stage with a five-year survival of 40%. Neat stuff. Some HPV infections can lay dormant for for 10-20 years before they cause cancer. Others who contract HPV and have a certain rare genetic mutation could have their HPV morph into this.
(And I am warning you, pippa, IN THE MOST SEVERE TERMS, that if you scroll down to look at those photos, they could very well make you throw up. I AM NOT KIDDING IN THE LEAST. If you saw “Grey’s Anatomy” a couple of weeks ago, you saw this. The difference is what they depicted on the show — which almost made me barf — was actually TAME compared to the reality. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED.)
Is anyone aware of THAT? No. No, they’re not. You can contract HPV from French kissing, oral sex, and intercourse. Basically, all the fun stuff. But have at it willy nilly. I’m not your mom. Still, if you don’t want your teenagers sexing each other up, just show them those pictures, ‘mkay?
Well. All righty. Calm down, Trace. That was a huge tangent from what I originally intended.
Look. We are ALL aware of breast cancer, aren’t we? It invades every facet of our lives for the entire month of October, which used to be a fun month about ghosts and goblins and gorging on candy. Now it’s all about boobs and not in a fun gropey way, but in a morbid tragic way. And now October football is all about boobs too, and not in a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader way, but in an I’m a burly man in stupid pink cleats kind of way. For three Sundays now, I’ve tuned in to watch my beloved football — and my boyfriend Cocoa Bear — only to be assaulted by the sight of giant brutes in macho helmets, beefy shoulder pads, and hot pink arm bands. Oh, and pink gloves. And pink chin straps. When they’re not playing, they sit on the sidelines sporting more pink gear. Oh, look. There’s Peyton Manning in a pink baseball cap. (I’m a girl and I don’t own a pink baseball cap.) There’s Legedu Naanee wiping his face with a pink towel. There’s the bottom of the goal post itself, wrapped in hot pink padding.
There are already so many venues for breast cancer awareness. Does it really need to invade the football field now too? Can’t I just watch football and think about football and not whether my boobs or the boobs of my friends are going to fall off? Please? Can I just, uhm, enjoy the game and not feel guilty because I just want to enjoy the game?
I hate misogyny, I really do, but I also hate the way women seem to insist on invading every damn space that once was men’s. How much do we want to take away from men in the name of equality or “awareness”? How much contempt do we have for men and the things that make men men? How feminized do we want them to be? Seriously. I love men and I want men to be men and I want men to have places that are just for men because those things are part of the beautiful manliness of men. Unless women are willing to have Prostate Cancer Awareness month — which apparently is September and there’s a baby blue ribbon involved and who even knew that stuff? — in the WNBA or the LPGA, which would be a form of equality and awareness, then I say knock it off, Susan G. Komen, et al. It makes me sick that you expect men to do what you’re not willing to do. (And even if you did do it, it wouldn’t be comparable in terms of audience because, honestly, who gives a tiny rat’s bottom about the WNBA or the LPGA? Not me, that’s for sure.) Rates of prostate cancer in men are comparable to breast cancer rates in women. But is there anywhere NEAR the clamor over that that there is about breast cancer? No. No, there’s not. My dad has prostate cancer, WNBA. Where are your baby blue shoes and baby blue ribbons and baby blue basketball nets? Where?
Enough with the hypocrisy. I barf on you all.
And leave my football alone.
Can’t we just let the NFL be the NFL instead of “A Very Special Episode of the NFL”?
I’ve heard it said that real men wear pink. BS! Real men wear silver and black!
I have a friend who suffered from oral cancer and lost half her tongue in the process. Today she is doing extremely well. It is horrible and I pray for your BIL and his family.
I have a question: I know it’s rare, but how do the men who get breast cancer feel about all the pink stuff? I mean, shouldn’t there be another color or something for them?
Brian — Thanks. His last radiation treatment is tomorrow. He’s lost his sense of taste, which could be temporary or permanent, and he has a bit of a lisp now because of the portion of his tongue they removed. But his spirits are better than they have been, so that’s good.
And, Brian, I know you mean the Raiders, but I’m choosing to overlook it. 😉
You know what? Real men even wear PURPLE — the Vikings! — but not PINK. Every other color is represented in football except pink.
Kate P — Good question. I have no idea.
I live in a small rural community in Michigan that boasts about 2,000 people. Our nearest neighbors and arch-rivals since we fought over the county seat, is slightly smaller. For the last 2 years we’ve had “Pink vs. Green” week in the fall, culminating in the football game, but including girls volleyball and other sports. The home team wears green (for lymphoma) and the away team “gets” pink. All sorts of unique fundraisers are held. But, the BEST part of the pink in football…the $12,000 raised each of the past two years stays local. Half is split between the schools for a scholarship fund for any student going into the medical field and half goes to a local care fund to help families stricken by cancer with gas money, a house payment,etc. If you’re going to hate pink for football, (and I totally hate the commercialization of the whole thing; I’ve had very close friends fight this beast and win, so far), could you make an exception for us? 🙂
AMEN SISTER. October is my birthday month, and it has been thoroughly hijacked by this ridiculousness. I was just talking with my BFF about this – do you think the players feel stupid having to put on all this pink crap when they get dressed on Sunday, and are trying to put their game face on? Listening to…well, whatever…on their ipods while they are lacing up the pink shoes?(Have you noticed that in MLB it’s started to take over May as well, in honor of Mother’s Day?)
The breast cancer lobby drives me batty. They act like they are the only people to ever get cancer. As a childhood cancer survivor, I would just like to mention that 1)September is Childhood Cancer Awareness month, and 2) Every day in the US and Canada alone, 2 classrooms full of children are diagnosed with cancer. Just sayin.’
A couple other points: Wearing tshirts that say “Help save second base” or “Save the ta-tas” are always inappropriate, but particularly in church. With the amount of money the breast cancer lobby has, if they haven’t been able to cure it…well…I won’t finish that sentence. Meanwhile kids – KIDS – have to hold freaking LEMONADE STANDS to scrape up every last dime to fund the research for their own disease.
MamaTod — I make all kinds of exceptions for the kiddos and for the fact that the money is staying local and not going to support the infrastructure of a massive juggernaut like Susan G. Komen.
Katie — Amen, to you too, sister! I remember your story and, yeah, where’s the money going for childhood cancer awareness? It strikes me that the breast cancer awareness thing is more about empowerment of women than it is breast cancer. And thanks to Oprah and — well, pretty much just Oprah — I am just worn down to a nub on female empowerment BS.
Cancer is a scourge. I’m not saying anything differently on that score. But can some areas of my life be left untouched by breast cancer “awareness”? Please? Or give equal time and equal play to other cancers. Seriously. It’s NOT the only cancer in the world.
And how much pressure is being applied on NFL players to wear all the pink? Just leave the NFL alone.
Are people really wearing “save second base” t-shirts in church?? Are these men or women?? Major ew.
I wanna ribbon for the pancreas. That kills everyone, not just half, and it’s nearly always fatal. Basically, if you know you have it it’s really too late.
Or – scratch that. NO RIBBON. Just a small thought for anyone suffering from cancer in its myriad forms. I’m a little annoyed with the whole ribbon dealio anyway. It was a good idea, but now it’s more about showing how much you care about stuff instead of getting anything done.
God, thinking so hard of your brother-in-law and his family right now – sending all good thoughts!
And yes, the pink onslaught is over the top.
NF — Yes! It seems to be about product, not CANCER. Sheesh.
sheila — It’s ruining the color pink for me.
I remember Cara talking about this on her blog a few years ago and in the midst of that comment thread, I declared we needed an ED Awareness month and that the ribbon would be a droopy blue one.
I still want that.
Oh, not just “save second base” t-shirts, rubber wristbands (a la Lance Armstrong) that say “I love boobies” are being handed out to high school guys. Well, duh. And their love has nothing to do with cancer. 🙁
MamaTod — /And their love has nothing to do with cancer./
Hahahahahahaha! I think that’s true for most men.
But wait. Are CHURCHES handing out “I love boobies” bands and other boob stuff?
You know, I would like to purchase a “Save Second Base” t-shirt — actually, one for me and one for Sheila — fly out to NY, drive with Sheila to the nearest FOC church whilst wearing our “Save Second Base” t-shirts, and stroll on into the fray.
Just to see what would happen.
Okay. I’m sick. That image is making me so happy right now.
Actually, the “Save Second Base” campaign was started by friends of a baseball mom who died of breast cancer. Her life was watching her boys play baseball, so that’s the “theme” they went with. As a fellow baseball mom, I give to them alone, and I wear that shirt proudly (but not to church, obvs).
When my dad was first diagnosed, I was sitting with my brother in the waiting room at Barnes, and I said, “I wonder what the color is for lymphoma, ’cause we should totally get some shirts.” He said he didn’t know, so we got on the computer and it took us, like, TWO HOURS to find out. WTH? And even then, some places say green and some say orange.
It’s all about PR. Leukemia/Lymphoma need to hire a better PR firm.
Tracey – I would pay actual coin of the realm for a picture of you and Sheila in the lobby (or whatevs) of the FOC church wearing “Save Second Base” t-shirts. (Though to them, the ol’ Sideways Hug might be second base, you never know.)
Oh HELLS NO…. speak of The Pinkening, and you see its hockey pads. Dear merciful heavens above, NOT HOCKEY. A pink stick or something, sure, but the full-on pads and glove/blocker set? DO NOT WANT.
NF just had an embolism.
Seriously, let’s just enpinken the world then, okay?
What about movies? Where can we pinken those up? Let’s put Rocky Balboa in pink boxing shorts. Darth Vader will sport pink. Let’s make everything John Wayne wears in every movie PINK.
We can recolor it. We have the technology.
I mean, I don’t think my life is pink ENOUGH yet.
Where is Brian and his Photoshopping genuis?? I NEED me a pink Darth Vader. When that happens, I think I will finally be aware of breast cancer. It’s just not getting through to me yet.
NF — The Sideways Hug!!! That’s ALL I ever get from the churchy menfolk! DAMmit! This is why there has to be sex in heaven. I cannot STANNNNNND an eternity of that. Any of yous guys approaching me in heaven better give me a right proper hug. If you sideways me, I’ll crack your skull. I don’t care if Jesus puts me in timeout, it will be totally worth it.
Oh, and the Sideways Hug in the FOC? I never even got one of THOSE from the men skulking around that place, all afraid of women’s purse straps and what not. I believe the Sideways Hug is full-on intercourse for them.
“yous guys,” Trace? What?? It’s a typo, but I’m leaving it. I’m a gangsta!
NF — That link ain’t working.
Heh, my embolism is catching. 🙂
I’d empinken my blog in honor of this thread except I’m not sure how to undo it afterwards. But hey, everything else comes in pink. Pink Bibles! Pink cars! Pink lattes! Pink cat!
See? I can’t even link properly!
Try this link here. A little better as you get to see not only the pads at rest, but Rick DiPietro practicing in them – and giving up a five-hole goal in them, heheheheheh.
Cranky Pants en masse! Love it!
I think Katie nailed it – it’s a lot about womens’ empowerment. Which is why we don’t see nearly as much red ribbon stuff for heart disease, which kills way more women than breast cancer. B/c that’s not a 99% + women’s issue.
Susan G. Komen may have jumped the shark, though, with their partnering with Planned Parenthood. Anytime you have to say “Well, yeah, we’re working with them- just not that part of them…” you have epic PR fail.
‘Our’ disease is ALS- we just give money and don’t worry about ribbons, etc. And it’s a good way to excuse yourself from mandatory “pink events”.
Thanks for the update on your BIL, Tracey. Prayers for you all.
Yeah, there should be a “close italics” in there.
Damn. I give up.
Sal — I fixed it. Well, I just took it out. So if “removal” is “repair,” then yes, I fixed it. 😉
NF — That photo is seriously messed up. It makes me angry. Had to click away. Is NOTHING sacred anymore??
You know, I think Obama should color his hair pink for the entire month of October. Actually, everyone on Capitol Hill needs to color his/her hair pink in October. Come on. CARE, already.
Darth Vader in pink = blasphemy! But for you I may be able to do something special.
Brian – I will spare you the indignity of working on such a project. However, it means that the rest of you suffer the indignity of seeing this video. Makes me wanna shoot lightning outta my fingers, I swear. Where’s Red Letter Media when you need him?
It is blasphemy. It’s ALL blasphemy.
BTW the other day I noticed one of my 6th graders wears an “I love b00bies” bracelet. . . I teach in a Catholic school. But I am terrified to say anything about it, b/c that might be insensitive. Or with my luck, someone in her family is a survivor or something.
P.S. One of my mentors taught the child (God rest her soul) who started the lemonade stand fundraising. The school misses her a ton and they do a lot for her foundation even years later.
Kate P — Is there a dress code that allows for boobie bracelets at a Catholic school?
I don’t think so! I’m new to the school this year but I heard last year they banned all those rubber bracelets because of the rumored connotations they had. So I’m just baffled that this girl had one on at all–and that specific one to boot!
I am so over the whole Komen pink thing. So over it. And I don’t care how politically incorrect that is. They lost me when it came out that they routinely give grants to Planned Parenthood. It stands to reason, given that the founder, Susan G. Komen’s sister Nancy Brinker, was on the advisory board of Planned Parenthood of Dallas.
Komen’s stated logic (we only give Planned Parenthood money because they provide breast cancer screening) is similar to the logic that says since Josef Mengele was such a good doctor when treating wounded soldiers, we can overlook the vile experiments he did upon Jewish prisoners. Besides, they aren’t “people” anyway.
I’m heartily sorry for anyone facing any kind of cancer. I lost my own father to it. But I don’t intend to support the pink crap, nor the organization whose CEO made over $500,000 last year alone thanks to their pink nonsense.
And if I see another “Save the TaTas” bumper sticker….
RT — Yep. It’s a product. Product, product, product with some tiresome “female empowerment” mixed in.
You know, I don’t know how much more empowered I can get short of growing myself a willy.