Let’s pretend you’re a woman. Some of you won’t need to pretend here. Let’s pretend you’re a blonde. See second sentence above. Let’s pretend you have an in-law who only emails you to send you dumb blonde jokes. Let’s also pretend there is never a hello, how are you, or what’s going on with you included in these dumb blonde joke emails. And let’s pretend you think you generally have a really good sense of humor, but let’s also pretend that you find these emails — again, the only communication you ever receive from this person — uhm, annoying and a teeny bit offensive.
So in this completely pretend scenario, are you, the blonde woman, overreacting? Are you hyper-sensitive? Do you just need to, uhm, spark a doobie and chillax or get drunk on mulberry wine?
Because, you know, I think about these totally random scenarios that have nothing whatsoever to do with me or anyone I know.
It’s all part of my generalized mania.
Thank you for your input on this entirely hypothetical situation.
In this completely pretend scenario, you, the blonde woman, are not overreacting. In fact, you have hypothetically been very patient, and the hypothetical in-law has been very obnoxious.
If I were asked, hypothetically, my opinion, I would suggest responding to the hypothetical in-law, requesting, gently, that the person cease emailing nothing but dumb blonde jokes. If there is no appropriate response, and the dumb blonde jokes without any other type of email continue, I would block or mark as spam for deletion the hypothetical in-law email address.
Before they were “blonde” jokes, they were jokes that mocked one heritage or another (Polish, Italian, etc). Some of my friends would tell me jokes that mocked my heritage. I just didn’t react. Eventually, eventually they got the message. Since email, that type is easier to ignore. It takes pretty much forever for people to get the message these days, though.
Yes, this hypothetical woman HAS been very patient. And, you’re right, trying to set it up as spam is probably best for this person.
Although maybe this woman would feel like it’s disrespectful or something. Still, that could be the best move.
Hypothetically, if I were this woman, I might hypothetically do as suggested in the prior comments above. Because I am generally hypothetically someone who tries not to hurt other hypothetical peoples’ hypothetical feelings, even if they have no hypothetical regard for mine.
My hypothetical sister, however, would do it differently. She is hypothetically far more direct and has no hypothetical time for such hypothetical annoyances. She would hypothetically email that hypothetical sender-of-blonde-jokes a hypothetical short and to the point message along the hypothetical lines of “Don’t send me any more of that hypothetically offensive hypothetical b***s***!” And that might, hypothetically, be the end of it.
Hypothetically yours,
Hypothetical Jayne, who is hypothetically barefoot and baking hypothetical blueberry scones instead of typing this hypothetical comment.
(By the way, the more I typed “hypothetical” the harder it became to type it correctly. Hypothetically, of course.)
🙂
Jayne — Hahahahaha. I admire your perseverance. That word DOES get harder and harder to type. Oh, these stupid hypothetical situations that exhaust us by causing us to type the word hypothetical!
I imagine our pretend woman wishes she could do what your pretend sister would do, but she finds herself hovering between your approach and your pretend sister’s approach, to the point where a spam filter — should it actually work — would be the best solution.
High Poe Thet Ick Lee, of course.
As a blonde woman*, let me just say that, no, I don’t think you’re being overly sensitive. Perhaps if it was the occasional joke interspersed with other communication, but being the only comms? No, that’s just not cool. I, too, would set the spam filter. I might even ask this hypothetical person to do it, you know, me being blonde and all. They might get the hint.
*OK, so I’m married to a blonde woman.
Does this person have a hypothetical quirk or trait? Is this person Polish? Or Jewish? Or gay? Or fat? Perhaps the hypothetical blonde in question could compile a list of jokes about the other person’s traits and start firing them off, right back at them – one a day. No message, nothing. Let’s see how that person likes it.
Cullen — /As a blonde woman/ Hahahahaha. I loved that you started it with that. I’m still laughing.
sheila — YEAH! Perhaps she could!
But I bet she won’t!!
Drat.
Ignore my advice. I spend my days and nights plotting my revenge, so I am not reliable. Unless you want a pound of flesh. Then I’m your girl.
Eh, I’d ignore him (Had a very, very insightful commentary about this relating to my personal background and deep philosophy but I accidentally lost it and am too lazy to re-type it…. that, or it was a drunken rambling after a few glasses of wine, and it is a good thing that I was so incompetent)
Jayne – I adore you and I adore your hypothetical sister.
Man, that stinks. I have an aunt who never e-mails me a single personal message but I get millions of forwards from her. I’ve never responded, and that hasn’t worked as a hint, so. . . other than hitting “delete” every time you see something stupid in your in-box, Ms. Hypothetical Blond Woman, I got nothin’ to offer except “Sorry for the frustration.”
And I have to add that just for a second, I pictured Cullen’s blogger profile photo with one of those big blond wigs superimposed on it, and cracked up.
sheila — Pound of flesh! Pound of flesh!
No. Can’t do it. Speaking as I am on BEHALF of this hypothetical blonde woman.
Kate P — I now want Cullen to Photoshop a blonde wig on that. It would bring me joy.
Hmm.
Let’s say, for the sake of illustration, that you have a hypothetical friend on the East Coast, who hypothetically enjoys leftover Boheme coffee on weekend mornings, who allegedly has an Aunt who may or may not have done something painfully similar, only it’s all glurge – a constant stream of “forward this to eleventy-six friends or your house will burn down and your wife will leave you for Brad Pitt” or subject lines like “FW: fw fw RE: FW: angels!!!1!one!” or the latest in Internet scares that Snopes shot down four years ago.
For the purposes of this exercise, imagine this friend asking repeatedly, through phone and email, for real news of the possible Aunt and her family, only to be actually disappointed. Picture the Aunt then possibly lamenting that she and her alleged nephew don’t communicate much anymore, but not changing the tone of the rumored emails. Hypothetically this leads to never calling, replying, or having anything to do with said Aunt, though rumor has it that she is also this imaginary non-blonde person’s godmother.
Now those endless glurges have stopped, and the hypothetical relatives only see or interact at theoretical family gatherings like funerals… but not things like the hypothetical person’s own real wedding, which pretend Aunt couldn’t be arsed to attend because of an alleged prior vacation plan. (Her own hypothesis, mind you.)
This could become a case where Aunt and imaginary person just don’t talk and are more contented that way – but that’s hardly the ideal, and it’s said to bother the alleged person almost as much as the Wave of Glurge. The actual counsel to the blonde woman from just such a person as we’ve discussed (in theory, of course)? Go gently. Set boundaries and keep them without apologies, but without getting angry. If necessary, delete these emails – but at least reply with actual family news of interest, since this is the kind of relationship this blonde lady of taste and culture would prefer.
And maybe the East Coast figment of fancy will pray for a blonde friend with hypothetical in-law troubles.
Life is too short to put up with crap… from *anyone*, even family.
Just my opinion.
But break out the mulberry wine anyway, and pour me one too, k?
NF — The hypothetical auntie with the theoretical vacation falling precisely on the date of alleged blonde woman’s reputed Internet friend’s wedding REALLY — I mean, I can only imagine — PISSES OFF make-believe blonde woman.
Cullen — HAHAHAHAHAHA! You went into moderation because of the link, but that makes me SO happy! The dark beard makes it perfect.
Now I can Fw:fw:Fw:FW:FW:FW!!!:FWW!!!: you all the dumb blonde jokes I get.
You are insane and I love it.
I’m with GraD- life is too short.
For anyone less than, like, a mil, set up the Spam-a-not.
Cullen, you’re so gorgeous, I spit Pepsi on my screen.
AWESOME HAIR, CULLEN!!!! Work that hypothetical blondeness!!!!
Blonde Cullen is fierce!
But Cullen, uhm, you know your hair glows, right? That you are possibly suffering from some kind of radioactive fallout?
I’m only concerned that you are sacrificing your health just to be a blonde.