Number two on my list of Episodes from The Trip.
My dry-as-possible, no-commentary, just-the-facts list.
So.
~ At one point, Resort Dude and I were in his coffeehouse, behind the bar, talking coffee. He asked me my background. I told him where I’d learned the “espresso arts” — that my training had been from a corporate entity.
“Oh. Corporate,” he said.
“Uh-huh.”
“I learned from God. He taught me how to pull espresso shots.”
“Oh.”
Strike Two.
(SO hard to do these without commentary. I am torturing myself. Why am I doing this?)
Maybe, he had a real dry sense of humor (yeah, I didn’t buy when I wrote it either)
My eyes bugged out at that.
Was he really being serious? I can’t even make myself read that as though someone said it seriously without the person coming across like Jim Jones.
Pippa, he was serious.
Cullen – Jim Jones – hahahahaha Totally
I learned how to smell BS from God. I think Resort Dude is full of it.
Brian — /I learned how to smell BS from God./
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! I am choking over here!!!
And Cullen’s Jim Jones comment. Every time I click on these comments, I howl at that all over again.
You know, honestly, with Jim Jones, thank GOD I survived. Who knows what he could have put in the cappuccino?
God came to me in the form of internet research and an instruction manual and taught me how to pull espresso shots.
Seriously, I can’t believe there are actually people like this in the world.
I just read that and I sat, stunned, realizing… “This man is not. Being. Ironic.”
Oh my word.
I learned from God how to clean a bathroom. And have beds set up for guests. And how to give them clean linens.
Gesh! People who think they are God’s gift to the world and you better enjoy them drive me nuts.
Seriously, dude, if I had to have brain surgery and right before putting me under, the doctor told me, “I learned from God how to cut open brains,” I’d be SCREAMING:
“GIVE ME THE DOCTOR WHO WENT TO MEDICAL SCHOOL!! GIVE HIM TO ME NOWWWWWWW, CRACKIEEEEEE!!!!”