56 superfluous questions!

My energies are a little scattered right now, so how’s about a deflecting mee-mee?

If you want to copy and paste your answers into the comments, feel free. Or put it up on your blog and let me know.

Okay. 56 Superfluous Questions:

1.ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT? I have a scar on my knee from splitting it open on the carpet when I was seven. My skin was like tissue paper apparently.

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM? Well, I know there are some hanging dust bunnies in one corner that someone — oh, maybe someone tall, if I knew such a person — needs to please please deal with.

3. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN? 8:15 a.m., I think.

4. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW? Answers.

5. WHAT DO YOU MISS? “What” do I miss? Okay. Here’s something stupid: I miss “Friends.”

6. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION? One is our elephant painting from Thailand. Meaning: An elephant painted it. Yup. It cost us 25 bucks American and was the most expensive thing we bought the whole time we were there. If I’m ever in Thailand again, I’m going back to that elephant camp and buying as many as I can carry home.

7. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5′4″ — and a half!!

8. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DAY? Not generally.

9. WHAT’S YOUR WORST FEAR? Being old and alone, if you really wanna make me cry, Memey.

10. WHAT KIND OF HAIR COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX? Dark hair. Always have.

11. WHAT ABOUT EYE COLOR? Usually blue.

12. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINK? Oh, please. Coffee, hands down. Energy drinks just shiver me timbers. Ew.

13. FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING? Pepperoni and olives.

14. IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Chinese food.

15. FAVORITE COLOR OF ALL TIME? I don’t have one. Really. I’m partial to warm tones over cool tones, though. And I do not like burgundy and blue together. No, no, no.

16. HAVE YOU EVER EATEN A GOLDFISH? Nope.

17. WHAT WAS THE FIRST MEANINGFUL GIFT YOU EVER RECEIVED? “First meaningful gift”? Uhm, I really don’t know.

18. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH? I have any number of ridiculous inappropriate celebrity crushes. It doesn’t matter if they’re dead or alive, either. I think Jason Taylor from “Dancing with the Stars” is beautiful. He’s a big beautiful cocoa bear. The guy is 6’6″ and moves like a dream!

19. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND? The kind that fits is my favorite “brand.” Duh.

20. WHAT KIND OF CAR DO YOU WANT? Uhm, well, I’d like to have a 1966 Mustang 4-speed 289 with a Pony interior and Poppy Red exterior. You know, nothing too particular. Other than that — believe it or not — I really don’t give two hoots about cars.

21. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING? Leaving where?? Will he bring me back a souvenir??

22. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE USA? Yes.

23. YOUR WEAKNESSES? Character weaknesses? Food weaknesses? If you’re not gonna be more specific, Memey, then no dice. Okay. Sorry to get pissy. “Pissiness” could be one, I guess. Also: My ring fingers on both hands are weak as newborn kittens. They’re just for show.

24. MET ANYONE FAMOUS? Yes.

25. FIRST JOB? Working at a produce place sorting through crates of moldy cherries and strawberries and worm-infested corn and stuff. Not that the produce YOU buy is like that behind the scenes. No. No. I’m sure it’s fine.

26. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL? Sure.

27. DO YOU THINK EVERYONE OUT THERE HAS A SOUL MATE? No. I don’t care for the phrase “soul mate.”

28. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED THIS OUT? Eating a Quizno’s sandwich.

29. HAVE YOU EVER HAD SURGERY? Yes.

30. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST? My pissiness and weak ring fingers.

31. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY? Oh, please. What am I, 9?

32. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT? All of them.

33. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? I kinda think I was named after a dude, don’t you?

34. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST TURN OFF WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX? Oh, cool! A Playboy Playmate question. Okay. I don’t like overly emotional men who want to “shaaare” or “tell you what’s on their heart” or sing you songs that you inspired (scroll down for it) Please man up and find your wee wee, thank you.

35. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU MISS ABOUT GRADE SCHOOL? My fourth grade teacher.

36. WHAT KIND OF SHAMPOO DO YOU USE? Cheap stuff and, I tell you, my hair is suffering. My hair just KNOWS and seems to be mounting some sort of vengeful coup d’scalp.

37. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Yes, I do. I really do.

38. ANY BAD HABITS? Sure. Doing lame-o memes is one.

39. ARE YOU A JEALOUS PERSON? Sometimes.

40. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Well, sure. I’m a very loyal friend. Tenaciously loyal. And I think I’m sorta fun. Plus I hate unresolved crap between people so I will alway try to work things out if there’s a problem and, wow, isn’t that sweetening the friendship pot? I will hunt you down and force you to work things out even when you don’t care or don’t want to. I am Rambo. Please be my friend.

41. DO YOU AGREE WITH FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS? No. Unless that benefit is a 401k.

42. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER? You’re supposed to release it?? I prefer to bottle mine. I sell it on e-Bay for 9.99 a bottle now.

43. WHAT’S YOUR MAIN GOAL IN LIFE? Finishing this meme.

44. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? My Truly Scrumptious doll.

45. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE? Oh, please. I have no idea. I can barely use the thing.

46. WERE YOU A FAN OF BARNEY AS A LITTLE KID? He was after my time. But I can tell you, he terrifies me now, so I have no reason to believe that wouldn’t have been the case back then.

47. MASHED POTATOES OR MACARONI AND CHEESE? Hm. If forced to choose, mashed potatoes.

48. DO YOU HAVE ALL YOUR FINGERS AND TOES? Yes.

49. DO YOU HAVE A COMPUTER IN YOUR ROOM? “In my room”? Like, did mommy and daddy buy me a computer for “my room”? No, no, they didn’t and I wish they’d pony up like all my other friends’ parents.

50. PLANS FOR TONIGHT? Nope.

51. WHAT’S THE FASTEST YOU’VE EVER GONE IN A CAR? Oh, the posted legal limit, I’m sure. But if I had that Mustang ….

52. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO? Jimmy Durante singing “Make Someone Happy.” One of my favorite songs ever.

53. LAST THING YOU DRANK? The only sodie worth drinking: FRESCA!! That means turtle in Spanish, pippa. *

54. REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT? I’m not currently registered as either. Haha, Memey. Nice try.

55. DO YOU HAVE A LOW SELF ESTEEM OR A HIGH SELF ESTEEM? Low. Crushingly anemically low. If you have some to spare, you could send it to me along with a box of chocolates and I will send you a free bottle of my bottled anger, okay? This seems fair to me.

56. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? I’m reading “The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay.” Amazing is so SO right. I’m in love with this book. (Although the font is bugging me. That’s a whole other post, actually. Book fonts and how they affect the way I feel about a book. All part of my generalized mania.)

*It does not.

Okay. I must rest my weak ring fingers now. They are worn to pretty little nubs.