MB and I have some acquaintances from a previous church who are “missionaries.”
And, yes, I hate to say this — and I’m totally hiding from God as I do so — but I call them “missionaries” as opposed to missionaries.
Here’s why:
This couple was sent off from the church with great fanfare and hoopla. They were moving to southeast Asia to start an orphanage, you see, and isn’t that a noble idea and all that. The wife’s family comes from this particular country and she inherited some land in said country. For their orphanage, right?
Howevah …… and here’s where it gets squinky for me and I don’t know why I’m throwing all Christians under the bus lately, but, well, I’m a crankypants.
The squink is this:
They didn’t start an orphanage. They’ve lived in this country for 4 or 5 years now. They’ve had 2 children while living over there. It’s cheapcheapcheap to live in this particular country, but, then again, the church supports them, so it’s even cheaper! Somehow, once they’d been “in country” for a while, the Lord conveniently “changed” their vision. They weren’t supposed to use their land to build an orphanage. No. They used the land to build themselves a HUGE house instead.
Now to be fair, they do take in foster children from this country. At one time, I believe they had as many as 6 kids total living in their home. The husband is an aspiring novelist and works on his books most of the day. I mean, he doesn’t work outside the home in this country. The wife homeschools the kids.
I guess I don’t understand HOW this is missions. I don’t get it.
Plenty of people in the US take in foster children and, yes, they get a small stipend or whatever from the state, but this couple is having their entire lifestyle subsidized by the church. I’ve known people who’ve taken in foster kids here in the US, and in every case, at least one of the parents worked outside the home. My own parents took in a foster child when I was 6 and my foster sister was 16, and at that time, BOTH of my parents worked outside the home. They were earning their own money. Now I’m sure there are people who take in a bunch of foster kids just to get the money from the state, but I don’t imagine the people who do this are calling it “missions” either.
Someone help me. How is this “missions”?
Is there something I’m not seeing?
To me, the idea of missions is an outwardly focused thing. An evangelism thing. Sure, this couple is teaching their kids about Jesus, but so is my sister. So is my brother. So are dear readers Brian and Kathi. So is any Christian family — one assumes — anywhere in the world. And they’re NOT being subsidized. My brother and sister have real world jobs where they earn real world money to support their children. They don’t sit back and receive tithe money from their churches so they can work on their Great American Novel. Or their Great Southeast Asian Novel.
I mean, to be honest, since we’ve witnessed all this going down with this couple (they have a blog we follow), MB and I have seriously discussed going BACK to this whackadoo church and saying we want to be missionaries. Ohpleaseohplease, let us be missionaries. Because it kind of seems like a sweet gig, doesn’t it? Being paid for what the rest of us work for? Church welfare in a beautiful country overseas?
Look, these are tough times. I mean, I’m in school right now to completely change careers. But maybe I can chuck all that, move to a cool country, call myself a “missionary,” and get on the church dole.
Come on, pippa! Let’s be “missionaries” and start our Sudden Yurt commune overseas!
Who’s with me?
My dad would call them “moochahs.” (Moochers in a Boston accent)
Missionary moochahs.
I would think that a denominational missionary, um, “service” (I don’t know from missionary services, as CoC missionaries are sponsored by individual congregations) would have better oversight over their missionaries.
I mean, they shouldn’t have to meet a QUOTA of souls or anything, but if you’re getting money to run an orphanage, shouldn’t someone be saying, “Hey, where’s your orphanage?!”
I hear you on the crankypants thing. I basically called our African missionary program racist the other night, so. Yeah.
sheila — Yes. I love that. Moochahs. Hahahahaha. Church-sanctioned moochahs.
A couple of churches ago (a couple of moves ago) there was a single lady who wanted to be a missionary to Brazil, and I initially was close friends with her UNTIL I figured out what a severe mooch she was. She had a lot of church people fooled, but the pastor figured it out in time and the church did not subsidize her Brazilian vacation.
I am totally on-board with Mission Yurt.
You mean there’s a stipend out there for what we do? Gimmeegimmee. I’m sure I’ve got a novel in me somewhere that’ll take years and years to find.
The amount of people living on the church’s dole is staggering. There are “pastors” who have fancy Apple notebooks with their faux-hawks and sole patches who sit in Starbucks all week to prepare to speak for an hour on Sunday. I don’t think this type of “pastoring” or “missions-work” is what Jesus gave his life for.
Lisa — You went into moderation. Because you’re a crankypants, I guess?
So how did the whole racist missions program comment go over? Hahahahahaha.
They’re welfare queens. They’re just welfare queens in Other Country, which sounds pretty plush.
This kind of behavior is one reasons I have so many questions about Christianity!
// I hear you on the crankypants thing. I basically called our African missionary program racist the other night, so. Yeah.//
Lisa, hahaha. I love you.
Ooh, if the SYC becomes “missionary,” that means we get a microwave! And maybe a home theater. Right?
Oh, Tracey. I’m trying so hard to be good on the cynicism part. You’re not helping me out here! 😉 Actually, this hits home. I (and “we” – meaning Brian) fully understand.
Lisa, as far as the African racist thing…Wow! We must hear more!
I KNOW I’m preaching to the choir, but this really pisses me off.
When I was 10 and living in the Philippines on Clark AFB, I thought we had it tough… and then our mother took us to visit a distant cousin in a remote area on Cebu Island. She and her husband, who were supporting Wycliffe Bible Translators thought they had it great! They had a small community of four 600 sq ft “houses”, a common library/community center/inn for visitors that was a whole 1300 sq. ft. and a generator which they ran for electricity until 8 pm each night. They had it “great” because they knew what the translators whom they supported, had it far worse than they did.
Lord, please spare us from “missionaries” who risk nothing in terms of deprivation or danger (as friends of ours that are evangelizing in a remote area of China).
…and thus the Sudden Yurt Outreach Missions Commune was born.
So, yeah… I would be livid about this if it happened in my church community. More than for any other reason? The money that they are using to simply support their life overseas… that money was meant to provide a home to children who needed it. And while fostering children IS great and important work, I’m shocked they can sleep at night knowing that they are using up resources that were meant to provide a safe and loving place for FAR more than 6 children. I hope someday they realize that and it haunts them. People who take money from those in greater need than they are deserve to walk the earth with a conscience that refuses to let them sleep.
Hmm. Turns out I feel strongly about this. LOL. Who knew?
Okay, here goes:
The way I feel a “mission” should be is that we’re ALL missionaries: you pick your spot — another country, another state, even if it’s your office or even your own home — and you live and preach the gospel. And like in the parable of the sower, sometimes you’ll hit good soil, sometimes you’ll hit rocky, sometimes the birds will eat it. But GOD gives the increase. Your job is to preach it and live it and serve.
So when a spot is picked, like say Africa, then you go to Africa and you serve. And you preach. And you live. Not to a specific population but to EVERYBODY. This mission that my congregation sponsors specifically targets the Black population of South Africa and Namibia. They intentionally do not open bible study centers in White areas.
Now, I’m not saying I don’t want them to serve these people. I do. I think they’re doing great things. BUT. . .this mission is run by a white man. The congregations that send him money are almost 100% white. Is it just me, or does this smack of paternalism?
What it comes down to is that I’m becoming more and more uncomfortable with this idea that Brown People can only be saved by White People. And while I’m sure some of this attitude comes from a good place, a LOT of it just makes me . . .I don’t know. . .squirmy.
And so I said so in Sunday School. And everyone looked at me like I’d grown two heads and both were wearing hoods.
On one hand, this is a shocking story, on the other hand, it seems like one I hear all the time– supposedly churchly people using their charisma or what-have-you to swindle other people out of their money.
I’m sorry to hear about it. But it does sound like being a missionary is a good racket– maybe you should try it.
Kate P — /Ooh, if the SYC becomes “missionary,†that means we get a microwave! And maybe a home theater. Right?/
Hahahahahaha! Yes! We’d better! And a new iPad for staying in touch with the heathens. You know, from a distance. We don’t want them dirtying up our pretty commune.
Marisa — /And while fostering children IS great and important work, I’m shocked they can sleep at night knowing that they are using up resources that were meant to provide a safe and loving place for FAR more than 6 children./
Exactly, Marisa! EXACTLY!
Lisa — /And so I said so in Sunday School. And everyone looked at me like I’d grown two heads and both were wearing hoods. /
Hahahahaha. Lisa, we would SO not be able to be in Sunday School together. Our dual crankypants selves would be too much for the generic Christian. But I totally agree with you. The notion that the brown man can only be saved by the white man is SO SO racist.
I love how this topic is bringing out everyone’s inner crankypants. I think it SHOULD. Because I’m sorry, it’s a real pisser.
And as Cara said, this is the kind of behavior that makes people question Christianity. I totally get that. I DO. BUT, for me, I try to separate the behavior of flawed people who happen to be Christians from Jesus, who (I believe) wasn’t flawed. I think it’s important to TRY to make that distinction. “TRY” being key here.
And you can’t spell Tracey without “TRY.”
(Uhm, wha???)
When I see pictures and read accounts in our bulletins of our missionary efforts, it’s usually along the lines of “We went to this country with the money you gave us and hired a bunch of parishioners to help us build them a new church building” or some such. I don’t think that our parish has anyone permanently overseas, just people who rotate in a month at a time to help the sister parish out, staying with a family that puts them up, living the same life as their fellow Christians.
We also have a domestic mission (for want of a better term) that hosts otherwise-homeless families in the parish buildings for a week; people sign up for the various housekeeping and hospitality chores that need doing: cooking and laundry and what-all.
To me it seems like this sticks to the model of the missions describes in the Acts and in Paul’s letters: he says at one point that everyone knows how he and his companions lived among them when they first spread the Gospel, taking no advantages and sharing their lives as one of them.
Combining that with Lisa’s excellent comment, it seems to me that if we make our lives into missions, we won’t seek to put ourselves beyond others, but be with them and present to them in any circumstance, so that they can see the Gospel working in a real human life and seek Christ. They won’t feel like sanctity is beyond them or that the faith is something just for “religious people” because they’ll see a normal warty stumbling crankypants believer wrestling with life the way they do – but with a difference that is borne of grace.
I’m loving all of these comments so far. Consider yourselves hi-fived, every one.
I wouldn’t have any problem with these overseas “missionaries” if they returned the money when “God” changed their vision. Stuff happens. BUT people gave the money with a certain idea in mind.
Once (thankfully NOT the church I attend now) there was a big fundraiser for the pastor’s root canal. He couldn’t afford it, and he needed one. It was supposed to be a “surprise.” I think we ponied up $200 and do you know what? Two weeks later they presented the money DURING SERVICE to the pastor for a vacation with his family to Branson.
We can’t afford vacations, and we sacrificially gave that money. I was pretty steamed, but I thought maybe that was petty of me or jealousy or something. Why was I feeling all against blessing the pastor like that? You know how slowly, when you’re in a culture like that, your thought processes can get a little twisted. It wasn’t a cult, but it practiced some superheavy groupspeak. I’m glad I left.
I like where I am going well enough, but… I am no longer naive and my heart isn’t in it all as fully as it once was. Nope, doesn’t mean I’m cold on God, though some pastors and churchgoers might spin it that way. More that I trust only “so far” because I know better.
Oh… I’m sure the church ponied up much more than “we” did. I meant just our family… we really dug deep on that one.
I am tempted to ask how much you got burnt for, but that would negate all your heavenly riches for giving, now, wouldn’t it? I think sometimes churches use these verses against people who want ACCOUNTABILITY. Not that we should trumpet our giving (I hope I don’t come off that way), but that we should see something happen with that money.
Mrs C — I am GOBSMACKED by this:
//Once (thankfully NOT the church I attend now) there was a big fundraiser for the pastor’s root canal. He couldn’t afford it, and he needed one. It was supposed to be a “surprise.†I think we ponied up $200 and do you know what? Two weeks later they presented the money DURING SERVICE to the pastor for a vacation with his family to Branson.//
WHAT???? Oh, nonononono. Now, see, I don’t care for this. Not one bit. I totally agree with you: When someone puts a need out there and people give based on that said need, it is NO BUENO to use the money for something else. In my opinion. That’s bait and switch to me. So did the pastor who received this money get his root canal in Branson then? Backstage at the Osmonds? How did the NEED for a root canal turn into a family vacation?? No, I’d be pissed if I were you, too. What you gave, you gave, and it cost you to do so, but you thought you were giving for a health need, not family recreation. A person NEEDS a root canal. They don’t NEED to go to Branson.
Seriously. No one does.
Mrs. C — //Why was I feeling all against blessing the pastor like that?//
You know, you hit on an idea here that’s HUGE in the church MB and I just escaped from several months ago. Sovereign Grace churches, pippa. First and only time I’ll ever say their name. Avoid avoid avoid. (Don’t know if you’ve read my posts about that experience, Mrs. C.)
But that “family of churches” is big on the notion of being a blessing to your pastor, being a joy to your pastor. It’s YOUR job to bless him. (I SO would not have been a blessing to that pastor. He knows our story now. I’m sure I’m not a blessing to him and he didn’t even know me. Hahahaha.)
That’s man-worship, though. That’s exalting this one man above everyone else. No one can keep a man accountable if their job is simply to bless him. How can you question anything he does? Shut up. You’re not being a blessing. Mind-control. Manipulation. They call it “submission,” but I would call it “surrender.” There’s a difference. One is humility; the other is giving up.
But back to your comment, Mrs. C. I think your reaction was completely normal. It wasn’t put out there as giving money to bless the pastor. It was put out there as giving money to meet a need the pastor had. (Which is a blessing, yes, but not a VACATION blessing. People go “Woo-hoo! Vacation!” They don’t go “Woo-hoo! Root canal!”)
You gave based on the said need. No one said anything about Branson. YOU wanted to meet a need, not send the dude on vacation.
Interesting stewardship of the people’s money.
Yeah, I don’t fault the PASTOR though because he had no idea people were raising money to fund the root canal he already had (sorry, not in Branson LOL). So, when he was presented with this vacation, of course he was happy and thankful. I wasn’t about to go “HEYYYYY!” in the middle of service, but I stopped giving to circulating money “pots” after that. I don’t “just” give money to people who ask for $5 here or there any more. I think much more carefully and try to give lump sums to ministries that have a good track record. Which does I guess hinder giving a bit so that it’s not “spontaneous” but I think the Kingdom (the real Kingdom) gets more value that way and I need to be a good steward, yk?
I hear ya on the mind control thing, though…
Oh, my, where do I begin? I guess I should start with my thoughts/input/opinion on the original subject of missionaries or “missionaries.†I attend a church that is part of a small Lutheran synod an association of congregations). We have missionaries in various places throughout the country and throughout the world. Sadly, with all of the financial troubles in the world of late, we have fewer and fewer missionaries in less and less places. The missionaries that we do have are all pastors that have been called from existing Lutheran congregations for service in the mission field. Their job is to spread the Gospel. They go into the mission field to share the glorious story of Christ’s sinless life, perfect death, resurrection and our salvation to those is this world who have not yet heard the message or to those in areas where we don’t have existing churches. In many situations these pastors work with local people training them as pastors and teachers with the eventual goal that the missionary would leave them a self sufficient congregation further spreading the Gospel to others. Our missionaries are not subsidized by individual congregation but by the synod as a whole. Congregations do make contributions to mission funds. Sometimes individual members of congregations make donations to specific missionaries and specific mission fields. “Results†vary from field to field, but the purpose is the same: spread the good news. Now, does that mean that a group of non-pastors opening an orphanage and teaching those children about Jesus isn’t mission work? No, I wouldn’t say that. There is value in every way that the Gospel is spread, it just isn’t the “traditional†from of mission work with which I am familiar. I do have to agree with you, however, Tracey that what is taking place with this couple doesn’t seem to warrant funding from a congregation anymore than any Christian parent sharing Jesus with their children does…
Which brings me to my next point. My family is, in essence, funded by a congregation. My husband is a pastor in the Pacific Northwest. I’ll try not to harp too long on any of this but I did feel a little bit offended by some of the talk about pastors on here (sorry, I’m a little thin-skinned). While we would never ask, expect, or even want our congregation to take up a special offering for anything for our family, I can’t begin to tell you how infinitely thankful we are for the anonymous gifts member of our congregation give us that allow us to do things we wouldn’t otherwise be able to (yes, even to go on vacation…eek! Well, to be fair, it was to make an impromptu trip to Michigan for my grandfather’s funeral but I think you understand what I mean). I don’t know if this is a surprise to anybody or not but pastors, at least not in our circles, don’t make a ton of money. I won’t go beyond that statement in this conversation other than to say most pastors families probably can’t begin to express their appreciation for what you do for them whether through gifts or simply help around the church. My second point is this: you might someday find my husband sitting in a Starbucks working on his Sunday sermon(though not likely, we really don’t do Starbucks), with his laptop (a crappy old Acer, however, not a Mac) with his spiked hair (yes, he has spiked hair). But, do you know that he wasn’t just there visiting a member who needed a visit with pastor but wanted to do so in a casual setting? Do you really know what goes into the work of a pastor throughout the week? Praise the Lord that some pastors have the freedom to take their work with them if it helps them to do their job. The life of a pastor is not easy, and it is certainly not just a Sunday morning gig. Just because a pastor looks a given way doesn’t mean that he doesn’t serve the Lord as he ought to. Sorry to get so snarky, but people have some serious misconceptions about pastors that like I said above, really hurt my feelings. No, they aren’t all perfect, even my husband would say that he could be better at his job, but try not to be too hard on them. I don’t know if all of that came out ok and I’m sorry if it didn’t. I’m feeling a bit bumbly tonight.
Oh, goodness, Tracey, I just realized how long my comments are…I’m so sorry. Please feel free to delete me 🙂
Mandy — In my comments about pastors, I was speaking of a very specific group of churches and their extremely dysfunctional view of church polity and the pastor’s function within the church. Maybe I didn’t make that clear enough. Certainly, not all pastors fall into this pattern.
Of course, a pastor might be in a Starbucks working. I mean, I’ve met my previous pastors at Starbucks on numerous occasions. But I personally wouldn’t care if a pastor was in a Starbucks playing video games. That falls into the “none of my business” category as far as I’m concerned.
I don’t have firsthand knowledge of a pastor’s life, but I imagine it can be pretty rough.
Please know my comments were about a very specific group of churches and their approach to the role of pastor. But please know, too, that I’ve gone through some pretty awful spiritual abuse at the hands of pastors. Stuff I haven’t really discussed on this blog. I would never broadbrush all pastors but, yes, I am now on HIGH ALERT for any church system that shows flickers of abuse or control.
I’m SURE this does not include your husband!
Tracey, I completely understand and I no way wish to undermine the struggles you have had with pastors/Christian churches as of late. I’m sure there are a lot more bad situations out there than I would ever care to know about. Thankfully, oh so thankfully, I have been blessed with wonderful church experiences (for the most part) my whole life. Please know that I really wasn’t trying to accuse you of speaking ill of all pastors. As I mentioned above, when the pastor talk starts I just get a little defensive. I’ll continue to pray that you find a church situation that suits you and that you can someday break free from the burden that these terrible experiences have placed on you.
Maybe to avoid confusion, so nobody takes offense by mistake, we should differentiate between missionaries and “missiories.”
NF — Good point. I didn’t do that. Speaking only for myself here, when I say “missionaries” with quote marks, I mean people who are relying on the church for their sole source of support yet who are not actually doing the “work of the church.”
This couple is a perfect example. I like them as people. I do. I just object to their willingness to take church money for essentially raising a family. The majority of the world does this without being paid. I believe a person’s family and a person’s life can be their personal “mission field,” much like Lisa stated, but, again, it’s volunteer work, isn’t it?
Maybe it’s an issue of scope for me. If this couple had stuck to their original vision of an orphanage, then I would have no problem calling them missionaries and labeling their work as missions — something for which they should be financially compensated. Maybe I see missions as something much bigger than oneself. Something which can’t be accomplished without divine intervention and financial assistance coming together to make it happen.
Here’s the thing:
I went on a short-term missions trip to this country several years ago. This couple was part of the group. I saw their plot of land, heard their vision for it, prayed with them about it. We spent time working at another orphanage they hoped to be affiliated with and, I’m telling you, that place was amazing. There were about 50-60 kids living there and they were the happiest shiniest kids you could ever hope to see. They were taught about Jesus. They danced for us and, uhm, made us dance with them. (In the 105 degree heat, all day, every day, I lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks just from dancing at the orphanage.) They had a band. They were pretty darn good, too. The philosophy of this orphanage was that they functioned as a huge crazy loving family. They weren’t looking to adopt the kids out. They were a FAMILY. They kept the family together. It was pretty cool, actually. The people running it invested in each child. It wasn’t “We now have another child we need to groom to be adopted.” It was, “We now have another child.” Some people might object to this approach, but it worked for them. It was truly working. They saw their mission as raising homegrown missionaries with the hope that they would eventually reach out to their own majority-Buddhist country.
By contrast, we had an opportunity to work at a state-run orphanage and it was the most depressing place I’d ever seen. Horrible. Dirty. Dreary. Crying kids who kept crying even when you held them and tried to play with them. Kids who were basically corralled in pens like farm animals. Kids who didn’t really know HOW to play. I’ll never forget it. Awful. I saw with my own eyes the difference the private Christian orphanage was making in kids’ lives. It was really cool. I took over a bunch of decks of cards, Uno cards, whatever, and spent hours making up card games with them. In the end, they made off with all my cards and I expected them to. Hahahaha.
But when I saw that THAT was basically the vision this couple had, when I saw that THAT was what they might have, yes, I was excited for it. To know they’ve let that go is really sad for me. Maybe a measure of my disappointment here is that I did see firsthand what could have been. Knowing that didn’t happen is a bit sad for me.
Mandy, if *I* can’t afford to go on vacation, but I’m digging reallllly deep in my own budget to fund your root canal because I see how much pain you were in, I don’t want the church to fund your vacation with the money. That’s all. IMO stuff like that should outrage you as well, because it DOES erode trust in the “church” and for “missionaries.”
Another thing that really bugs me? When “God” puts a different call on people. Um, for example, if someone thought “God” called him to be a pastor, but suddenly a job with a lot more money came up and now “God” wants him to do something else. I was very miffed to see a pastor at our church raise money to do some sort of “BIG WORK” and then wouldn’t you know it? He’s now on staff at a nearby more rural (read: white with money, expanding) church. I really did pray that God would show me if I needed to give money to this fella and never heard back. Actually, I really DO think I heard from God on that one because I heard nothing and gave that amount. 🙂
Mrs. C — //Actually, I really DO think I heard from God on that one because I heard nothing and gave that amount.//
Touche!
Thanks, Tracey! And especially for the powerful story. What a difference a little personal attention and love can make.
Mrs C – LOLOLOL! Quote of the thread.