Do not ask me how I stumbled across this, I beg of you.
Anne Hathaway’s version of the 70s hit by Leo Sayer.
You know, this guy:
Wacky clown Jesus from Godspell!
Shudder, shudder, shudder.
Weird, but I fixate on only one thing in this disturbing-on-so-many-levels photo and I’ll bet it’s not what you think.
It’s this:
The GIANT YAWNING U’s between his fingers.
Look at them! LOOK at them, pippa! The arms of a starfish are closer together. They make me think of spiders. To get from one finger to another requires an exhausting trans-Atlantic flight. I don’t know. I’m really freaked out. I’m looking at my hands right now and I have nice pretty little V’s between my nice pretty little fingers. That’s normal, right? I’m sorry. I notice men’s hands. Kind of a thing of mine. I don’t like pretty hands on a man, nor do I like freaky yawning starfish hands. Honestly, I would never ever want this man ANYWHERE near me — definitely not my type and it’s not just the hands, shockingly — unless I came across a really stubborn mayonnaise jar. Then, yes, lose the suspenders, lose the hair, lose the t-shirt, lose the face, and get your wacky bag o’ jacks paws over here. And tout de suite on that, Crackie.
Good Lord, where was I?
Oh, the song. Yes. Please listen and don’t think about his hands, okay? And if you know the original, what do you think? Better? Worse?
Do you like her voice? Hate her voice? What?
I need thoughts.
Tell me things about this — anything — so I stop thinking about Starfish Hands.
I swear to you, my first thought was “Why does she have a picture of Richard Simmons on her blog today?!?”
And then after I read the post, all I could think of was “GIANT JAZZ HANDS!”
And after I listened to the song, I remembered why I never was that thrilled by the song the first time around and didn’t think it really needed to be remade, although it was certainly improved (albeit only a tiny bit) by the rap additions.
White guys should not sport the ‘fro.
Straight guys should not sport white suspenders and matching white pants and purple shirts.
Okay, those are my random thoughts. Don’t imagine a starfish attaching itself to the front of your face and smothering you in your sleep.
[ducking]
Hmm. I liked it. I really didn’t expect to (especially with all that “remix” nonsense in the beginning), but it was pretty good. I already knew I liked her voice. She sang Queen’s Somebody to Love in Ella Enchanted and it was quite good.
I thought that guy was Richard Simmons for a second! But he definitely does not have hands like those. Yikes. And, uh, Richard would not be allowing mayo on anything.
This song also is on the “Ella Enchanted” soundtrack–I had a feeling, so I looked it up. [/nerdy librarian]
So, it’s a little older, and as a remix it’s a bit overwrought for my tastes, but I do like her voice. Weirdly enough, one of the ladies in my choir said her granddaughter is friends with Anne and she is very nice.
Cullen — I like her voice, but it has a bit of Minnie Mouse to it, doesn’t it?
GraD and Kate P — Why did you both go into moderation? Do I have some Richard Simmons filter I’m unaware of??
AHHH!!!! I just vomited a little in my mouth. My sister had that album and she played it all the time. Especially that song, over and over and over like she had a pre-itunes repeat on her record player. I HATE IT!!! I HATE THAT COVER!!! Had it erased from my mind by listening to years of Rush and Ratt and VanHalen and now you brrriing it back. *shudder*
I just have to think about Anne and how much she reminds me of Audrey Hepburn, who is one of the most beautiful women to ever walk this earth. Scrub, scrub, erase, erase, Anne, Audrey, erase, more wine, Audrey, erase… repeat…
I was mostly okay with it, although I was a touch concerned abour the bustier, and that one picture where she appeared to be feeling herself up…but whatever, rows your boat, I guess. She’s gorgeous, so I guess if she wants to feel herself up…
As for first picture, I am SO GLAD that I am not the only person who doesn’t like Godspell. Everyone I know raves about it, and I just think it’s stupid. Also, we had to watch it in my Gospel of Matthew class, and now it’s nigh-unto-impossible to read anything from the Gospel of Matthew and not hear the creepy clown Jesus voice in my head.
She did a good job with “Ella” singing “Somebody to Love” IMHO…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPPH-UzsAgM
He reminds me of Doug Henning.
And that is not a good thing.
GDazz – it was the Seventies. There’s really nothing more to add, is there? The Seventies got all over EVERYTHING.
However, I have a small soft spot for the whitefro, because it’s tricky to pull off. I think Leo’s is not that great. Mike Commodore is probably my favorite whitefro. Look at this thing! (Sorry for the self-link, I had just posted about this so it was fresh in my mind.)
I always liked “Love You More Than I Can Say” and “When I Need You” better, so regarding the song, I’m the wrong guy to ask. Anne’s much easier on the eyes, though, isn’t she?
Tracey – I think we all should have a Richard Simmons filter.
Brian — Yeah, my sister was REALLY into it, too. Forgive me for bringing it up.
Katie — It’s funny. I have a love/hate thing with “Godspell.” I was IN “Godspell” and had a great experience doing the show. I was the baby of the cast — I mean, literally, a baby — I was cast when I was 13 and turned 14 during the run of the show. So yeah. MAJOR learning experience for young Tracey. “Godspell” can be a great show. I’ve seen versions over the last few years where it’s been much more updated. It lends itself quite well to modernization and improvisation, so any version that does that default 70s clown Jesus thing isn’t trying hard enough, in my opinion.
Don’t just do the cliche precious “Godspell” — it CAN be better. MUCH better. I’ve seen it. So that’s my issue with it. Clown Jesus is OVER for me.
sheila — Yes! Is there an app for that??