This is my favorite sentence of the day:
“He is a somewhat chubby but cooperative boy.”
Okay. Let’s think about this. Chubbiness precludes cooperation?
Really, I think it’s important to ponder the ramifications here. I mean, what other conditions preclude cooperation, one can’t help but wonder?
“She is a somewhat incontinent but cooperative girl.”
“He is a somewhat oily but cooperative boy.”
“He is a somewhat leathery but cooperative man.”
“She is a somewhat disgusting but cooperative woman.”
I mean, really, this one sentence has opened my mind to the myriad conditions — previously unknown to me — that just may inhibit cooperation amongst the peoples. You’re having difficulty with teamwork on the job? Well, did you ever consider, pippa, that maybe, just maybe, your colleagues CANNOT cooperate because they are sweaty or stumpy or lascivious and simply cannot be called upon to be cooperative? Maybe you should think about that. Impediments loom at every turn!
And perhaps you have one or more of these roadblocks to cooperation and can now use them as excuses for being an impossible unruly ass.
You are stingy. You are myopic. You are furry.
Thank you, random sentence.
The entire world has utterly changed for me.
Huh?!?
That is one weird non-sequitur.
Comment by GradualDazzle — December 1, 2009 @ 4:38 pm
She is a somewhat slatternly but cooperative woman.
(IMHO, that is the best kind of slattern)
Comment by JFH — December 1, 2009 @ 5:17 pm
Hey now! “Somewhat chubby but cooperative” - sounds a lot like me!
Comment by Katie — December 1, 2009 @ 9:11 pm
Did they mean “clubby”? As in, cliquish, but still inclined to cooperate on tasks? Would make marginally more sense that way. But what do I know, I am a bowlegged yet cooperative man.
Comment by nightfly — December 2, 2009 @ 8:31 am
JFH — Yes, hahahaha, slatterns should be cooperative.
NF — /As in, cliquish, but still inclined to cooperate on tasks?/
Hahahaha. Nope. He was chubby but, you know, cooperative.
Comment by tracey — December 2, 2009 @ 12:48 pm
At least he’s not chubby but somewhat cooperative. That’s, like, a whole other thing.
Comment by Rob — December 3, 2009 @ 1:34 pm
Hey, you gave me a chuckle…hard to do today, but you managed it. Thank you so much!
Comment by ann — December 14, 2009 @ 1:20 pm
I seriously just stumbled upon this blog. I am at work (sort of) in my office, and I am just laughing out loud.
So, thank you… from a handsome, yet very efficient man, for your treatise on ‘Cooperation’:)
Tracey, you are hilarious.
Comment by Ron — December 15, 2009 @ 11:36 am
Hey, Ron — Well, thank you! What a nice comment! Hope you hang around.
Comment by tracey — December 15, 2009 @ 11:09 pm