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i haven’t forgotten

I will be posting the Maybe Church posts soon. I’m just trying to figure out the best way to present it. So much has happened, so much I haven’t shared with anyone.

But I wonder, too, if the whole sordid stupid tale is a little “inside baseball.” Not that you all wouldn’t understand it. There’s no problem on that front, I’m sure. The posts I’ve written — long ago now — were written to try to explain this place to the best of my ability, but it’s just byzantine. It’s so bizarre. You can grasp a point of information, but once you turn it all over in your mind, it only raises yet another question. Basically, the FOC is a huge retarded rabbit hole that seems to have no bottom. I’m giving fair warning that you’re going down that hole with me.

Here are two things you need to know before reading the rest of the story:

~ The definition of gossip/slander in the FOC is not the standard, universally understood definition. Now, they don’t have a hard and fast definition that they publish in a handbook or a membership agreement or anything like that. Oh no. It’s much more slippery and insidious than that. A person has to figure these things out for himself — or not. I figured it out when it bashed me upside the head, which I’m not sure actually fits the definition of “figuring it out for myself” but there it is.

My streamline of their unspoken definition of gossip/slander is this: Gossip is anything we (the FOC) disagree with, don’t like, or anything that doesn’t show our organization in the best possible light. Gossip can be anonymous with no names named. However, if we name names, it is not gossip.

So, pippa. Cement that definition in your brain. It’s accurate. It will help you as you read along and discover what a horrible gossip I was/am.

~ Second thing about the FOC that I figured out when it bashed me upside the head: Women are second-class citizens. Married women and married men are not to speak to each other unless they’re married to each other. You’re basically having sex with that person if you do so. Do not interact with anyone of the opposite sex not your spouse.

This will also be helpful for you to remember as my extreme whoredom will soon come to light.

Okay. So. Fun stuff.

The onslaught starts soon, Crackie!

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some people have asked

About my BIL’s health.

As you may remember he was diagnosed with Stage III oral cancer last year and underwent tumor and lymph node resection and radiation.

To be honest, post-radiation, his quality of life has been greatly reduced. Radiation to the oral cavity area can permanently damage saliva production and that’s been the case for him. Swallowing, eating, speaking — these are all a chore now. You don’t realize how much you need saliva until you don’t have it anymore. The man is a psychologist and needs to talk to do his job. His energy post-radiation is also tremendously impaired.

A few weeks ago, he started having pain again in the same area as before. This isn’t a good sign. Oral cancer is notoriously aggressive and, if it recurs, it tends to do so within 2 years. He is waiting on another PET scan to see what is going on. My sister has told no one else in the family but me and MB. Her kids have no idea — which is as it should be right now. My oldest nephew is away from home, a sophomore in college; my middle nephew is deep in the throes of his heavily disassociated teen years; and Piper is Piper, happily ensconced in 5th grade. They don’t need to know unless and until there is something to know.

So any prayers you can spare would be appreciated, pippa.

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in my inbox yesterday …….

Uhm ……..

I believe Original Banshee, on the left, is supposed to be an American Girl doll? I have no idea. Frankly, she just looks like she’s dressed up for Easter to me, but what do I know? Baby Banshee, on the right, apparently went as Superman Fireman. (She recently went to a little boy’s birthday party. In that now-required gift bag that parents give out at their chirren’s parties, this boy’s parents had included his favorite things: a Superman costume and a fireman’s helmet. BB put the helmet on for trick-or-treating. She has no context whatsoever for either Superman or firemen. Guess she just liked it, is all. Funny girl. It kills me that Superman has hot pink tights.)

And as far as Banshee Boy, well, he clearly went as living proof that cuteness triumphs over all.

halloween2011b.jpg

(I had to try to tweak the red eye in this photo and it didn’t work that well, sorry.)